Changed

This past Sunday, we ended our series called "changed" on Sunday nights at [lit], our youth worship experience for grades 6th - 12th. This was our last message series for 2013 and by coincidence  tied in many of the the other series we did this past year, like Greater Things and Extraordinary from January and February, Rich from March, Collide from our summer Beach Retreat and Who Do You Say That I Am from September.

When I was sitting in the funeral service for a good friend of mine in October, I knew that many hearts were stirred to change. Many would want to make a difference in the lives of others as my friend Ken had done, just about every day of his life. But a thought hit me as I sat there, fighting back the tears and emotions; would any of us really change? I knew his wife and children would, how could their lives not change. But for the rest of us, those of us who think about doing good and helpful things, but ted to get busy...would we start to act upon these thoughts as Ken lived out before each of us that knew him.

I wanted to believe so, but.....2 or 3 days later, I had already missed a few opportunities and 2 or 3 weeks later, I had missed 50-60 opportunities. This is where the "changed" idea hit me. Is it the big moment that brings change in our lives or is it really the small, everyday steps along the way that bring change?

What else brings change? That was a question I started asking and I came up with some props on the stage to represent a visual of change....

 

Each of these represent change in some way. Like the picture from the very top, lights need to be changed when one blows out...The creepy stryrofoam head represent the changing of hair styles, when we grow tired or bored of the one we have now....the art picture represent change because it's an original. Anything added to it would change the original work and alter it from it's original state....the tire, should be self explanatory, but for those who have never changed a tire, it represents the idea that we change these when they are worn out or when they blow....the changed shirt represents that we change clothes (some of us often and some not often enough, ha!).

I wanted to create a visual that left the students thinking about change in their own lives. I also started 'lesson card," not just for the sake of the student but for me in my preparation as well. They really helped me prepare throughout the week as I created these to hand out. Each student who attended, walked away with a decorative card with a bible passage and the 3-4 main points of the lesson.

 

Lesson 1 dealt with sanctification and how change is a process, not just a one time thing...even though the one time, big moment created the change...it's the process that moves the change forward. In this change, our hearts and minds and changed more towards what God loves, how God see's and less of what we want to love and see. Basically, it's more of God and less of me...day by day. We often leave the day by day part out but that's literally what it is, the successes and failures, each moment, drawing us closer to His heart.

Lesson 2 dealt with transformation and what it meant to be changed by the renewing of our minds...an internal change. Often, we have learned behavior modification, how to behave depending on the surroundings we are in, and that type of change is shallow and ultimately dangerous because it creates in us the theory of being a mile wide and only an inch deep. The analogy I used was from a TV show I happened to catch on the Velocity channel...I never watch TV and this was the perfect show for me to watch, 3 days before this lesson. The objective was to restore a Model A 1931 Ford and the guy didn't have enough money to fix what truly needed fixing on it, so he just wanted the exterior to look good and for it to be in driving condition when he came to pick it up. All was going well until they reached the frame of the car. it was the original frame and it looked awful. There was a fear that if they allowed him to drive off in this condition, it could fall apart after the first turn and the whole car would fall apart. After refusing to test it, they finally gave it a shot with a sledgehammer and after hitting all 4 corners, the frame busted apart and fell to the floor in pieces. What they learned was this, "you can't put lipstick on a pig." Even if the exterior looks great, if the interior is busted up, the whole thing would fall apart. If the frame is damaged, the whole vehicle is damaged, even if no one can see it. That's exactly what is dangerous about behavior modification....the outer actions might look ok, but the inner desires of the heart and beliefs will destroy the whole thing when we try to turn a corner because it can't hold up under the problems we have created.

Lesson 3 dealt with follow and this was simply based around the life of Peter. When Jesus met Peter, Jesus was a Rabbi and Peter, a fisherman. Jesus pursued Peter in a few ways and then after He was done teaching and after Peter was finished emptying his nets, there was an offer to follow. Do you think Peter fully understood what he was doing when he decided to leave the family business behind and follow Jesus. the scriptures don't tell us exactly but you can gather from a few stories along the way that Peter was struggling to put it all together, until there was that one moment when Jesus asked Peter, who do others say I am, and after answering Jesus made it more personal...""what about you? Who do you say I am?" Peter respond, "The Messiah, the son of God!" Wow, what happened in the life of Peter for him to realize this; he was changed? Not in a once and for all moment, but gradually, along the way....step by step. We ended with this idea, the calling of Nathaniel. Nathaniel was a non believer until Jesus kinda did a cool trick and blew Nathaniel's mind, then he was a believer and Jesus said, "if you think that was something cool, I will show you much greater things than this." The journey has purpose. This changed life is moment by moment, step by step, with a greater purpose than us at the center....it's God centered and our lives are being changed into His image more and more everyday, if we are stepping with purpose.

God gets the glory in this change! It's God, at the center of it all, step by step, day by day, moment by moment. Praise God for the journey, the ups and downs, the failures and successes because it all of these that when added up, over time, looking back, we can see...as Peter did, wow, I have changed!

Collector of People

I heard something the other day at the funeral for my good friend, Ken Moore, that has echoed in my head for the last 3 days now! I can not get this out of my head and I had to turn to my online journal to try and make sense of this analogy! 

As many of you know, I am an analogy person! I love a good, relatable situation or story, when explaining something that is, well....unexplainable. I have had a few people ask me, who was this guy Ken? I posted a journal thought a few days ago about who Ken Moore was to me, but this analogy was the greatest explaination of who he was and who anyone like this is.

I'll start it off this way, I used to be an avid collector of baseball cards, basketball cards and football cards! Avid might be an understatement...I have a closet in my office that won't hold them all...it's quite ridiculous, looking at a closet, jam packed with notebooks and boxes of cards and then sitting outside of the closet are 7 more boxes of cards! 

I have some valuable cards in the mix, Mickey Mantle, Ted Williams, Hank Aaron, Walter Payton, Michael Jordan, Kobe, Peyton Manning, etc...and then I also have my autograph collection in those boxes as well....over 500 autographs and memorabilia....with no where to go. 

At one point, back around 8-13 years old, I could tell you everything about each one of those players, based upon the information given on the backs of those cards. Where they were born, what they weighed and what their batting and slugging percentages were in any given year. The statistics were memorized, because they were fascinating to me. I no longer hold that kinda info on these players, but at one time, it had become more than a hobby, it was a lifestyle! I loved everything about the hobby!

Fast forward to Wednesday afternoon, while sitting in the service for Ken Moore, I was heartbroken, red eyed from crying and emotionally, a wreck! Story after story, had me laughing and crying again, all in the same moment. I was reflecting on what an amazing friend I had lost and what a amazing person this world just lost! 

When it was time for Ken's sister to speak, she filled in all of the old details that he had talked about, many times. The stories he had told me, were all true. And then, as she was explaining her brother, she said this, "you know how people collect things....stamps, cards, etc....Ken was a collector of people." And my heart became flooded with emotion because I had never heard a more truthful, fitting analogy of a person, in my entire life! Ken Moore was a collector of people, completely! It wasn't just a hobby, it was how he lived...his lifestyle! 

Collecting people? Doesn't that sound weird or morbid, kinda? Not if you know someone like Ken! This guy never forgot a detail, a name, a face, nothing!!!! He had memorized the backs of each persons card that he met! I once stole his phone, to see if he had some sort of note system in his database somewhere, and of coarse he didn't! It didn't need to be written down, because it was not a hobby to Ken! It was how he truly lived! 

I knew him to be that way with me and the people around him that I knew as mutual friends, but his wife shared a few stories with me after the funeral that just astounded me and made this "people collector" analogy even more concrete in my head...

As they were trying to contact people to let them know about his passing, they started to comb through his phone and call the people that didn't live nearby. What they found was an extensive phone book of contacts, people that his wife had no idea he was keeping up with...like the people in their old neighborhood in Virginia and most interestingly, the couple that they had gone out with on a double date, 30 years ago, before being married...Ken was still in active communication with them over the years!

This is not learned y'all, this is a way of living, truly caring about each person you ever come in contact with and making them feel important because you hold their friendship or acquaintance in high value to keep in contact with them. Ken, knew the details of each person he met. It's like the back of a baseball card....not just the team they were on, but where they were born, what they liked and didn't like, where they had lived, what their struggles and joys were about. 

That's as real as real can get! That's genuine friendship....listening, not just talking....which is mind blowing to me because Ken was a talker! He carried every conversation and told story after story! An active listener and talker! That is rare my friends! I can only think of one person in history, who was like that....His name was Jesus! Jesus made people feel welcome, he made them feel like they all mattered equally, he listened and spoke! Attentive ears and powerful words that followed!!

Christ embodied for us, who we are to be to the world around us, His image, to a world in need of mattering to someone! I wish I possessed this gift! I have seen first hand, the life change that comes with treating people in this manner and it is beautiful to watch! 

So, as you and I become more like the image of Christ as we follow Jesus, may it be our prayer that every person that we meet, feels important, connected and loved! Instead of looking at people as projects, let's begin to move away from the hobby of friendship and become more deeply connected to genuine friendship, by collecting people, knowing each with purpose! Not to fulfill anything in us, but to pour ourselves out and fill others! Yes please! 

My Friend, Ken Moore.

Tomorrow, I will be heading to the funeral for one of the "good guys" in this life, gone to soon. Actually, Ken Moore was without a shadow of a doubt, the best guy I have known in the first 41 (42 tomorrow) years of my life. In a world that has watered down the genuine characteristics of friendship, and everyone has become a "best," Ken was one of a kind and quite literally, the embodiment of the word "friend."

You see, as a youth pastor, we come into a church and make immediate relationships. It's our calling, our passion, our inner drive. It's who we are and I guess you could say it's part of our gifts our Lord has given those in ministry. But, after 17 years of doing this, I have noticed a trend...you come to a church, do your thing, make friends and after some time has passed and your work is finished, you are called elsewhere and many of those friendships end. They don't move on with you. I mean, the fondness always remains, but being in the trenches of everyday life stops and the everyday or every week conversations turn in to 2-3 times a year conversations. Friends on Facebook, followers on Twitter, but the genuine "how's life going for ya" conversations end....

For the first and only time in my life, I had one of those friendships come with me and that friend was Ken Moore. I left Lawrenceville FUMC in 2006 and was still friends with Ken Moore, because he pursued me. From the week I left, Ken and I were on the phone, chatting about the church, the new kids, the old kids, how the move was going and those conversations continued right up until the beginning of this year.

So I wanted to take a moment to explain who Ken Moore was, too me...and to everyone else that knew him.

I first met Ken in the fellowship hall, right before youth group, in 2006. He walked up, introduced himself and his kids, Nic and Natalie. Nic didn't meet a stranger and Natalie was a shy little thing. Ken carried the conversation (as I would find out in every conversation after that, Ken always carried the conversation!). I explained what we did, where his kids would be and then he said the phrase every youth minister dreams about, "ok, so where do you need me," and from that day, Ken didn't miss one single Sunday night, retreat or event...even long after I was gone. It was too good to be true, but Ken always followed up on what he said he was going to do and I also found out as our friendship grew, he always followed through...always!

Ken never approached us and told us what we should be doing better....he always approached those moments with sleeves rolled up, working boots on and standing behind the phrase, "how bout I help in this way..." He always had a plan. It was as if he was not just one step ahead of the game....he was 10-20 steps ahead of things. If there was a new student visiting, the student and family had met Ken Moore already! If there was a student who hadn't been attending, they had received a message from Ken Moore! If the student was in college, graduated from the youth program, they had received a message from Ken Moore.

Over the years, when we met for lunch, the first hour of our lunches (sometimes they went 3-4 hours), were him filling me in on what everyone was up to from Lawrencville FUMC. He had pictures, he had messages, he had stories and he had joy in his voice about every single student and adult he was telling me about.

The one moment that has always been with me was the week before his first Spring Break Beach trip. He volunteered and wanted to be prepared so I debriefed him as best I could. I told him about the group sessions and the small group sessions, the talent show, the free time, the differing roles between a small group leader and a chaperone. When it came time for me to explain the last night, the alter call night, I couldn't come up with any words...only to describe it as intense and for him to be ready. He asked, "what does that mean?" Of coarse, I had to be honest and tell him, no words could really do it justice. I said, "just be ready and you will know what to do when it happens." Years later, Ken would tell me he was terrified of that first Beach Retreat alter call because he had never been in that kind of environment before, with kids crying, hugging, forgiving one another, rededicating their lives to Christ and for some, coming to know Christ for the first time. That night, as the alter call started, I saw Ken, embracing students who ran to him for prayer, encouragement and support. He was changed! He told me he was! He had never prayed with anyone before, in that kind of manner and something changed in his life, on that trip. I saw a man, who had already been present in the lives of so many students already, have a godly presence, purpose and passion that drove him to be the great mentor, friend and counselor he became.

In the years that passed, I took a job at Alpharetta FUMC after serving Smyrna FUMC for 3 years and because it was a little closer to Lawrenceville, Ken decided to surprise me a few times by bringing a car load of students to Alpharetta for youth group. Those moments meant the world to me, to see the middle schoolers I had, all grown up as high school students and some in college. I never asked him to do any of this...once again, it was Ken, rolling up his sleeves and doing what he did best...loving people....genuinely! Looking into the hearts of others, sensing a great need and doing whatever it took to meet that need!

A few years ago, after the birth Audrey, Ken made a special trip over to H& R Block, to visit with Toni, myself and Anita Solty, but it was clear from the minute we walked in the door why he was really there...to meet Audrey! And she took right to him. He had Anita take a few pictures on his phone and these will be forever cherished in my heart.

 

In the last few years, Ken would bring his son, Nic, to the lunches and that was an added bonus because I felt that I never had the chance to fully develop the relationship God had planned for me in the life of Nic. We talked about his kids all of the time and they were his pride and joy. The next hour of our loooooong lunches were about Nic and Natalie and what his wife Angie was up to. He always seemed to have a trunk load of stuff his was taking to the post office or UPS that had to be shipped. He was attending football games, school events, etc...even though I didn't get a chance to be around his family anymore, it was as if I had been a part of their lives over those 8 years I had been gone from Lawrencville because I knew everything that was going on.

Ken was a details guy! I say this while laughing out loud because I can't clearly express the long, drawn out stories that he would tell me about things that I normally wouldn't care about...and even in my ADD state, I still had no idea who he was talking about sometimes, but the stories were so fascinating about who he was helping and what he was doing to organize this and that, I stayed glued to him. Not to his stories, just him...because I knew, every single time I was with Ken, I was in the presence of someone that was special. Someone who cared about others more deeply than the average person. Someone who treated every chance meeting, with a stranger, acquaintance or friend as a meeting of purpose.

This past Thursday, Ken had come to my mind, in a way where I knew I should have called him, but I didn't. I got busy and forgot. I never once thought that I wouldn't get to talk to him ever again. These last few days have been filled with emotion and sadness because I learned on Sunday night, right before youth group had started, that Ken took his life. I have struggled with the person I knew him to be and the road that he must have traveled to get to where he had ended up. In speaking with his best friend and some others, I was able to put the missing pieces together in my heart and know that Ken had not been himself lately and the battle with depression and anxiety that had been such turmoil in his life lately.

It's going to be hard to say goodbye to a one of a kind, well....really, a once in a lifetime friend, tomorrow. I don't want to say goodbye. So, Ken....I know and we all know that what happened was not you. It was a succumbing to who you thought you were and those of us that know you, the hundreds of youth and adults who have posted on your Facebook page speaks volumes to who you really were, I love you and will miss you greatly! I'm not angry, just deeply saddened and heartbroken. I know you are completely healed and healthy and I consider myself to have been blessed to have known the "best guy" I have ever known.

Girls Weekend - God's provision

Girls Weekend - November 1-3

One of the areas I have always joked about in my world, is that I am secure in masculinity, even though I have been surrounded by females my whole life. (Trust me, it has rubbed of in many ways because I am not your typical guys guy!) I didn't have any male cousins, my grandfathers passed away when I was younger, my own father wasn't present in my life and my uncles also passed away when I was young. So, as I sit here, contemplating our girls weekend coming up in November...as a father of 3 daughters, I am beyond excited for this event!

I have been doing youth ministry for 17 years and while youth culture changes every 3-4 years, one thing that hasn't changed in all of those years, is the influence the media, culture and peers play in the lives of female adolescents regarding their image and self esteem. I have seen it in youth ministry and I have seen it played out in my own house. Young girls are being bombarded with "what pretty is," or "what a real girlfriend is like," or "what you wear determines how you feel about yourself and how others define you"....I could go on and on for pages here, but if you have a female in your house under the age of 18, you know what I am talking about.

For years I have wanted to have a girls only weekend, but for as connected as I am to the feminine side of life, you wouldn't want me putting together a girls retreat. That would be a disaster of epic proportions! 

Over a year ago, God dropped a blessing in disguise into our laps in the youth ministry department, with the hiring of Kari Hines! We had no real idea the talent and passion she was going to bring to this position of youth ministry assistant....we only knew we needed help, especially in the area with our female students. 

Kari has been prayerfully and diligently putting together an amazing girls weekend for quite a while now, and it is shaping up to be an amazing opportunity for our female students to have a life altering encounter with God, as they focus on the theme, "are you walking with God or running with the world?"

The retreat is over a full weekend and mainly focused on high school girls, but Friday night is a celebration for all of our female students from 6-12 grade. Kari has lined up some very powerful moments that will draw each girl to take a look inward, as they connect and uncover the beauty that God has created in each one of them. But more important, it's not just the "what" they are going to focus on, but also the "how." 

Christin Hoffman, one of our former students here at Alpharetta First UMC, will be graduating from Auburn University in December and I have had the pleasure of waking along side of her the last 2 years as I have watched God completely grab a hold of her heart and do a radical transformation in her life in the area of connecting with her gifts and abilities and her relational skills with girls of all ages. She will be our main speaker for the weekend and if you have ever been in the room when she opens her mouth, get ready to fall out of your chair laughing and then have a box of tissues handy as well!

We have also been blessed to build a relationship with the UGA Wesley Foundation over the last year and their talented worship band and the girls from Wesley Foundation are coming to lead us in worship on Friday and Saturday. 

Meals will be provided and there are more activities planned than what I have space for here! Please go and sign your female student up for this event! I signed my 6th grade twins up this afternoon and can't wait for the opportunity they will have in joining together with their peers and the older girls of our church, as they meet together to worship our God, encourage one another and dig more deeply into what it means to walk with God. 

Thank you to Kari Hines for her direction, gifts and passion for the female students of our church and community! They don't know how truly blessed they are to have you walking with them at this crucial point in life. And thank you you to all of the mom's and volunteers who have agreed to volunteer for this event...from hosting girls in your homes, to serving the meals, to shuttling these girls to the Methodist Youth Center! Your service to our girls is appreciated far more reaching than what I could actually communicate. As a dad of 2 daughters that will be attending on Friday, thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you are about to create in the lives of each student that participates. (I am speaking as a father here, not the youth pastor)

Get your student signed up now at www.afumc.org and look for the youth tab. You can register online or at the Methodist Youth Center. If you would like to help in the volunteer area, please contact Kari Hines at khines@afumc.org.

Lastly, this event has been prayed up for months now and we ask that you join us in praying for everyone involved in this upcoming Girls Weekend! Invite your friends from school. This is an open event to all female students in iur community! 

In His Joy,

Jay

Catalyst - Day 1

So, in the only way I know how to start an actual day off right, I locked my keys in my car when I got to Catalyst Conference! I mean, within seconds of pulling in and checking my phone to meet Ashley in the parking lot, "bang!" The door shut and curse words were flying through my head, but I just laughed it off instead of getting mad.

I didn't want to have that moment set the tone for the rest of my day! I texted my wife to explain my blunder and her and Audrey showed up, like a knight on a horse, prepared to slay the "bad day dragon"....

Reggie Joiner cranked the conference off well with an incredible look into how we are failing our children and youth in church and Christian education inside the church. I need to go back and read my notes again, because he was firing them off, one after the other. 

I could tell we were all refreshed and prepared for the day after that....but what I didn't expect was the friendship that Turner and Christin had formed with another catalyst attendee...she sat with us and was like a normal part of our team! Her testimony was out of this world...literally, just one of those testimonies of complete brokenness and complete transparency! She actually stuck around the whole day with us and we were truly blessed by her presence. 

We then broke into our lab sessions and didn't truly get a break until 5:30pm. The labs I visited were: 

1. Knowing your identity as a church - by Leonce Crump. His main statement that resonated with me was, "how you gonna serve a community if you don't know the needs of the community around you." He encouraged church leaders to get involved in the community by asking questions, so when people in your community come to your church, you are answering the questions they are asking.

2. Missional Ministry - by Jo Saxton. I had never heard of her and didn't know what to expect. She was on spot in calling the church to look back in order to look forward. Not a looking back at what once was, but rather, at once worked that we dropped and forgot about...the early church didn't have budgets, buildings and rock star worship...they had Jesus. That was their whole marketing scheme....to make much if Him by meeting the needs of commonality in the community.

3. Hyper linked - by David Kinnaman. I was really looking forward to this one because I had read his 2 books and as one of the leaders in Barna Research group, his information was going to be current, factual and relevant. His whole premise was to say, technology has changed the world entirely...and the church sucks at embracing a powerful tool to advance the gospel....2 huge statements he made that drove home his point. 

- we all used to have to buy the things, individually, that are now located right within our pockets....video cameras, picture cameras, record players/tape players/CD players, calculators, board games, telephones, tv's, VCR's, etc....are all now located on a single device. It has taken a massive amount of technology over the last 100 years and placed them all on one single unit! Wow!

- want to know the importance of technology? Look at what this generation is learning to do without that were and still are standards for us, good and bad...don't need a bank to do banking, don't need a library to read books, don't need magazines to read current issues, don't need tv sports scores, dont need a mall to go shopping, don't need church to know Jesus....see the trend?

Lastly, the evening session with Bob Goff was out of this world and yet so simple! I will save that for a post on its own. I was cheering one minute and destroyed the next! Compelling stories of what loving others actually means for us. 

Tomorrow is the day the conference moves over to the actual big room at the Gwinnett arena and Kari will be joining us tomorrow, so our whole team gets the chance to learn together. Expectant for tomorrow! 

Catalyst - The Night Before

Last year, I had the opportunity to attend a leadership conference for church leaders called Catalyst. In a nutshell, thousands of church leaders converge upon the Gwinnett Arena, here in Georgia, and the participants and raked over the leadership coals! 

The speakers are worth the price of admission but the take aways are even greater....the resources we get to leave with are amazing! I still haven't finished reading all of the books I received for free last year! 

Last year, I wandered out into the highway of fast traveling vehicles and I never caught my wind because I felt so hurried and rushed! This year, I am more prepared, laid back and ready to be refreshed, recharged and relaxed! 

Over the next few days I will attempt to keep all of my thoughts and ideas together as I give thanks for this year, while looking back at last year....

Last year, it was Turner Lee (middle school coordinator) and myself....fast forward to this year, we are taking a team each day...a college student who is praying about ministry, our youth ministry assistant and one of our incredibly committed youth volunteers! This team has helped me be more prepared over this last year than any of the 16 other years I have been in youth ministry! I couldn't think if a better way to celebrate what God has blessed me with, than to get a jump start on the next year as a team! 

Kari, Ashley, Christin and Turner, you all hopefully know how much I appreciate you and what you do for me as an individual, not just as a youth pastor! You have each enriched my life, specifically in areas that I am weak in and have been so gracious and kind to put up with me (I am not being self deprecating here, haha!) because my weaknesses are apparent and your patience, mercy and kindness is apparent! 

I could not do what I do without your support, love and patience! 

Ok, mushy stuff is over! Let's get prepared to open our minds and dream, rest our busy minds and listen and calm our anxious hearts and learn! 

First up, tomorrow morning...Reggie Joiner...couldn't think of a better way to get things rolling! 

Oh, That's the Greatest Commandment...Oops!

Commands come from authority or authority figures. Authority is a person in charge (or in command), an expert or a set of statements used to determine. Do you have the same problem I had growing up, hating anything authoritative?

Most land on 2 very different views of authority;
1. Authority is there to protect, set boundaries and keep safe.
2. Authority sucks all of the enjoyment out of "free choice" and sets joy killing laws, absurd statements and rules with a power hungry, ego trip. This may also come from the style of music you may have listened to as a teenager....Eazy-E and NWA did nothing to convince a teenager in the late 80's that the cops were your friend.

For instance, ask a teenager what their view of law enforcement is and you get comments from, "upstanding protectors of our community" to "I smell bacon!" I landed on the breakfast food option as a teenager.

Most of us have authority issues as adults as well. We have bosses that micro-manage, we work in environments where encouragement is as common as a Bigfoot sighting....oh it seems to be the real thing but it always turn out to be a fake. Authority figures only have to show up to work when they feel like it while the base employee grinds their way through 60-80 hours a week.

We are also authority figures to our children, ruling with a commanding statement of , "because I said so," as a final verdict in many issues.  It may go something like this;

Kid: Dad, can I have a candy bar
Dad: No sweetheart, maybe after breakfast.....(ha!)
Kid: But why dad?
Dad: Because it's not the healthiest thing to eat first thing in the morning.
Kid: But dad you had the other half of a Kit-Kat bar this morning...
Dad: Um, well...you see...what I was doing was.....
Kid: Why can't I have one too?
Dad: .........because I said so!

We also have authority issues when it comes to God and we don't even know it.

It is very popular in our culture to look for the "love fairy" of the Bible, (also known as Jesus) and completely ignore the other teachings and statements He made as well. What I mean by the above statement is this.....Everyone wants a piece of the Jesus "love" teachings! Jesus taught us to love others as God loved us, unconditionally (John 13:34-35). Also from that passage is this idea; we correctly show people God by the way that we love one another.....and yes, that is true! But there is a very common idea that Jesus kinda threw the judgement book out the window and just decided to love everyone. We want His love but everything else, nah.....

Doesn't Jesus say in John 14:15, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments....and again in John 14:23, "if you love Me, you will keep My Word." How in the world can we claim to know Christ, want His love and not follow or pursue His commandments with all that we have?

Now, we can go through an array of topics and word studies to determine what "His Words" and "His Commands" are, but why not just take the exact teaching of Christ on this subject and lay it out here.... Jesus said in Matthew 22:37-39, "you shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart, with all of your soul and with all of your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And the second is like it; you shall love your neighbor as yourself."

Right, I hear ya, it;s hard enough to love your neighbor as yourself...but isn't that the commandment that gets most of our attention....learning to love the people we are around everyday. We ask God for help in our relationship with family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, acquaintances, etc....but very seldom do we ask God's help in loving Him more. And that seems to be the problem.....without a love for God, the other love is useless. It really is pointless. I mean, yes...it creates peace in household and harmony in the office, but what good is that love unless it comes from the Giver of True Love! Without the love for God first, the love your neighbor principle is created and sustained within our own heart and we just don't have an unlimited capacity to love like that.

So you may be saying, "right, I love God and I love my neighbors...I'm good"....but whose love is it that we are loving God with? That is the key to all of this....if we were try to live out the greatest commandment of loving God with all of our heart, soul and mind, we would completely fail at it. It is impossible for the human heart to conjure up that kinda love, continuously and completely. Because of the Fall (Genesis 3), we are imperfect, sin drenched beings who have a sinful bend to our desires and seek after things that are selfish in nature....how can an imperfect being love perfectly? We can't and that is exactly why Jesus came, to fill in that gap for us and through the coming and indwelling of the Holy Spirit in our lives. So, to love God as Jesus commands in John 14, we need.....Jesus. And doesn't Jesus say, "if you love Me, you will keep My commandments......?

So then, can a believing Christian, a follower of Jesus, a pursuer of Christ-likeness and discipleship ever make the comment, "I love Jesus and His teachings on love but that stuff about ____________, well, that's just a bunch of garbage." I just don't see how it is possible....Now I am not saying that we can't struggle with some issues and things in the Bible, trust me....I have plenty...but, who's in error? Is it me or the Bible? Is it me or His commands? Is it me or His Word?

I heard someone say in one of the Biblical commentaries I was reading a year ago, that anytime we approach the Bible with the phrase, "well I think," we have already emptied the Bible of it's power because we have now elevated ourselves as an authority of something that is Authoritative. The argument that is very popular in our current culture is just that, culturally minded. It says, "well the Bible was written so long ago, for a different audience and for different people. The principles are still good but some of the teachings are outdated and don't apply today....." I get that idea and have often thought it myself, throughout the years.....but, as I wrestled with this and struggled with it, in my pursuit to fall more in love with God, through Jesus Christ, a thought hit me recently....what part of God's nature and character makes the cultural argument acceptable...knowing that we love Him because He is omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent. He is still the same God who was present then, with all power, not bound by time. He is now, who He was then.

So, as I was taking a look at my life, asking the hard questions, where does my life fail to fall into accordance with the love of God (I had to stop making my list because it was so lengthy), I wondered who else might be struggling with this same issue? What areas of your life might you be willing to accept the love teachings of Jesus on but upon closer inspection, your love for God is out of whack because our lives don't match up or are not in alignment with His Word....because, just one more time for emphasis, Jesus said, "if you love Me, you will keep My Word." Not to be perfect at it (because we can't, remember), but actively pursuing and living a life of repentance, not sin justification.

A good reminder of this idea of disagreeing with the Bible based on culture acceptances, cultural beliefs and social ideas is found in Isaiah 55:8-9,

⁸ For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
⁹ For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

That is Authority and this Authority I fall in love with more and more, everyday! 

Who Cares If It's All Made Up!

Have you ever met that individual that had so many stories that were completely unbelievable, but you wanted them to be true? You know, story after story, detail after detail, you just kept asking questions to probe a little more to see if you could really pick up on whether or not the information was factual....but the story was completely riveting, you just wanted, hoped them to be factual....

The 2 ladies we worked for this week in our High School Mission Trip to Bybee, Tennessee, were just those individuals described above....I can't make this stuff up! I have no idea if these stories are factual, my heart and head tell me "no way!" But I couldn't stop asking leading questions because I had to hear more! 

So, here goes the ones I can remember....

1. Day one, the mother, Deloris, is giving me and 2 other female students a tour of the house.....one could literally stand in the center of the living room and see the entire house....rather, you could see what was visible! Mounds upon mounds if stuff everywhere....sorted, monopoly games, Star Wars books, Star Wars collectible figures, Star Trek books and dvd's, elephant figures....sorted, yes....in massive, massive piles! 

As we hit the living room, the daughter walks in, Robin (about 50 years old) and proceeds to tell us she was born right there, I mean right where we were standing...EWWWWWW!!!!! But she didn't stop...her grand mother died in the next room and her grandfather died in the room we were starting in...."he died right there where you are standing Jay, in his rocking chair....and we kept his rocking chair and every we left the room or house, he was always rocking in it when we came back." Of coarse I had to ask, "you mean before he passed away?" And Robin replied, no silly, it was his ghost and he used to Rick in it so hard, he broke it...plum off the glider!"...my reaction, "welp, we need to get back to um.....well, ......um, cutting stuff! See ya later!" And out of the house I scurried!

2. When Robin was showing me her collection of things the next day, I noticed a painting of Elvis on the wall, so I had to ask, "you like Elvis huh?".....she didn't miss a best! " I danced for Elvis once." So I had to ask, "where!" Robin said, "right there, silly," pointing to the living room.....I had to ask, "you mean right there at the very spot...." She said, "yup, changed my life!" I was quickly doing math in my head as I googled, "when did Elvis die," on my phone. So the questions continued, "you mean Elvis was right here?" To which she said, "no silly, he was on one of dem white tapes!" I almost laughed my way out of her house because the closeness between her and Elvis was just too powerful for me to take in...,.,

Now, these next stories were told tonight, at the family picnic. ASP always does a family picnic to invite the families to do we can all meet the families we were working for. We went and picked our ladies up and they were excited! They were the only families who showed up....and they were in rare form tonight!

3. I walked in on a conversation they were having with Ashley and a few of our students....Ashley knew that I would love to hear her story, so she asked her to tell it again. Deloris told me that she once rode an elephant and giraffe! You know I couldn't help but start asking questions.....I said, "how did you do that," to which she replied, "I climbed on and held on tight!" What!!!!!! "No, I meant where?" She said, "at the Knoxville zoo." At this point, I was looking around to catch everyone's eyes to see if I should believe this story or not, but no one was tipping me off, so I continued, "how in the world did you do that?" She said some boys dared here to do it, she she just climb in their pen and started riding. "How did you get on" I asked...."I climbed and held on tight! The giraffe by the neck and the elephant by the ears!"

So of coarse I had to ask, "how fm did you get down," to which she looked at me with a "you big dummy" gaze and said, "I just slid down!"

4. Now for the greatest story! She survived a hurricane! Not in her house, rather, in her car...sounds believable, right? Haha! Here goes! Her friend was driving a car that Deloris was riding in and all of the kids were in the back seat (robin was a teenager). A tornado came and swept them in to the air and dropped them on the road an hour and a half away...so you know I couldn't leave that story alone....I asked, "what did y'all do?" Deloris replied, "we started the car and drove an hour and half back to where we were sober could get to where we were going," WHAT?

Then robin picked up the story, "yeah, I was sleeping and when I woke up I noticed we were in the tornado so I thought to myself, 'we may live, we may die, I'm going back to sleep.' and them boys were screaming in the back seat too." So I asked Deloris, "what did you do," and without missing a beat she replied, "I told them kids to shut up!"

5. This one is more of a statement....Ashley asked Deloris if she was a good dancer and said, "no," and then paused...."but I have a good 2 step...," so apparently she does dance. I then told her, "I can't dance," to which she shot back at me, with a powerful voice, "yes you can!" So it seems that I can, in fact, dance because Deloris said I could!

6. The one time I wanted to ask a question but didn't, I wish I had.....when we were taking them to their red hat society meeting, I told her that they would be riding with Ashley and that she had air conditioning, to which Deloris said, "I don't believe in air conditioning!" My mind immediately thought, "you have to believe in air conditioning because its real!" Like, you can't, not believe in it, but I think I know what she was trying to say, that she didn't like air conditioning but I was to afraid to get my mind blown about some crazy story about how air conditioning wasn't actually real.

So why was I so intrigued by these ladies and their stories? I think the answer to that is obvious....they were AWESOME stories!  But then it hit me, I bet these ladies never get a chance to talk about themselves, to anyone! No one is asking questions and no one is listening...all they needed was for someone to pay attention to them, to care, to ask, to speak, to take interest! 

It didn't matter if these stories were real or made up to me, it was just important that a conversation was taking place and someone wanted to know all about them....it was beautiful! 

I'm reminded that Jesus loved questions! Very rarely did he answer a question right out, but asked questions to lead to more questions. In this world, connecting with others is important! It brings a sense if hope alive in the heart that someone might actually care. It doesn't matter that these were probably made up stories...what matters is that we asked, we listened, we talked. 

Who, in your world might be right around you, just dying for someone to talk to, to have listen to them, to enter into a meaningful conversation with. 

Old Hat, New Hat.....

My 3 year old loves, loves, loves the book, "Old Hat, New Hat!" I don't think I could stress just how much she has truly enjoyed this book on her short life. For 2-3 months straight  she wanted it read to her every single night and she got so good at it, she could speak along with you when you flipped the page.

What made this so enjoyable was the emotion she put into each specific detail. For instance, "too small" was said in a high pitched, squeaky voice...."too tall" was spoken with a deep, booming, elongated voice." Page after page, emotion after emotion, she made the story come alive, in her own way.

My favorite part of the book was her emotion after he tried on all the hats and didn't like any of them....the shopper puts on his old hat and says, "just right..." The store owner says, "just right?" and Audrey would even say the phrase as an actual question. Then, the guy looks in the mirror and says, "Just right, just right, just right," and Audrey said each statement with satisfaction. And then, with a "I'm cooler than you" kinda statement, Audrey always finished the book with, "new hat......ooooolllllllldddddddd haaaaaaaaaat"

Because of the theme of this book, I am reminded of a debate that has been going on for centuries, in the Bible.....which way is the right way? Some like the old style, while others like the newer, more contemporary style. But that's not the only disagreement you see in the church today......all over the place you find arguments like, "we dunk, they sprinkle," or, "we baptize infants, they baptize babies," or, "we go to church 3-4 nights a week, they go to church only once," or, "I said the sinners prayer, they went to confirmation." On and on and on and on.....I could go. No matter what denomination or what practice each does, there are claims of "we are biblical and they are not," "we do it right, they do it wrong," "our way is biblical, there's is not." What do you prefer, "the old hat or the new hat?"

I love the statement that Andy Stanley said recently in his sermon, "My Bad Church Experience " (If you haven't heard it, do so now.....Part 6 is Andy's message)....where he says, "if the message of the church is for everybody, then the culture of the church shouldn't exclude anybody." Now, there are times when we hear statements like this and say, where is the biblical evidence for this....I'm glad you asked....

In Romans, chapter 3, Paul has just finished setting up God's righteousness and then laid out how no one else is righteous.....but he doesn't end there. He takes 3:21-31 to explain how we are made righteous. There were huge arguments going on between the Jews and the Gentiles. The Jews had this system that they were having a hard time being freed from and the Gentiles had no system and the Jews thought they should be under this system, but they couldn't be. Paul makes a statement that there is no difference between Jews and Gentiles....now that statement alone would have brought on strong arguments from either side....there were obvious differences! But the differences that they were arguing about were actions, attitudes, historical, etc....Paul, cuts through all of this stupidity and says finishes...."there is no difference because ALL have sinned and fall short of the glory of God," Ouch! All, in the Greek means....all. The Baptist, the Methodist, The Catholic, the Jew, the person dunked, the person sprinkled, the person who sings out of hymnal, the person who dances to to a rock band....all have sinned and fall short. The playing field has just been leveled to the real issue, the only issue that matters.

We are all sinners, so is there now no hope? NO! Paul continues (vs 27)....."we are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Jesus Christ!" Thank God!!!!! So then Paul turns to the the Baptist and says, "where then is your boasting?" (not literally)..."is it in your mode of baptism, the Lords Supper, your tent meetings and revivals?" Paul then turns to the Methodist and says, "where then is your boasting? Is it in your sprinkling, your saying of the Lords Prayer every Sunday, Your Apostles Creed Moment? Then Paul turns to anyone one, of any denomination and asks the same question. What is it that we are boasting about that makes us more right (righteous) than anyone else? If the answer is not Christ and Christ alone, we are all wrong!

In many ways, church has created an environment that is mostly for church people, based off of comfortable rituals. If you grew up in any denomination, that is what you are used to...your old hat....and there ain't a thing wrong with that, until......it becomes exclusionary. Until it become, we are right and they are wrong and then we are doing exactly what Paul asked us not to do....boasting in things that don't matter.

But, this doesn't end with Paul...no sir (or ma'am)...James, the brother of Jesus (or half brother, ha) delivers the greatest blow here....(my paraphrase here) Hey, church people, I know you are used to doing things your way and you are comfortable with your styles and ways and it's pretty obvious when someone new enters your building and isn't used to the way you worship...they stick out like a sore thumb on a hand. They are late to stand when everyone does and they look lost when it comes to the greeting time, especially if they are asked to stay seated so everyone in the church can zero in on the target that was just placed on their forehead.....Y'all, come on...listen to this, "it is my judgement, therefore, that we should not make it difficult for the Gentiles, who are turning to God." (Acts 15:19). This statement comes during the time when the church was just getting started and there was a council of church leaders who gathered to discuss what should be done with these new Gentile believers. Basically, the argument was, "I like my new old hat and I think they should have to wear our old hat too." Even though the freedom in Christ allowed for them to wear a new hat. They were under the practice of the law but no longer the regimented keeping of the law that had become so screwed up.

If we have truly been placed on a level playing field because we are ALL sinners, fallen short of the glory of God....why would these folks, who have received the grace of God through Christ, boast about anything being right, other than faith in Christ Jesus! There is to be no boasting about any modes, any sacraments, as the true and right way....we turn into Pharisee's when we hold those views and arguments. Basically, we are saying, "hey, come to our church because we do it right....don't go to that other church, they got it all wrong." Unless they are teaching a message of salvation outside of faith in the death and resurrection of Christ for salvation, they are getting it right.

Which do you prefer, the old hat? The new hat....awesome! Wear it, enjoy it, which ever you are comfortable with....but know, satisfaction in that hat is not satisfaction at all. There is a much greater satisfaction that comes through the grace found in the redemption through Christ Jesus....that is all we got to boast about....and we didn't do anything to deserve it nor did our actions have anything to do with attaining it. That's something to boast to everyone about!  

Remember, That One Time At Lake Sinclair...

Hey guys, something that means a lot to me, is happening tonight...well, really, over this whole weekend really....and you may have the same thing happening in your world as well.

Tonight, some college kids are on a retreat, seeking to deepen their walk with Christ as they sharpen one another, laugh with one another, disagree with one another and build relationships that will last a lifetime! These college students, about 8-10 in size have a very interesting story.

Most of them come out of the youth program that I served in my last church in Smyrna, Georgia. And some of the college students that are attending are youth from my current church I serve at in Alpharetta, Ga. They didn't really know each other that well 6 weeks ago and what has happened over that time is just beautiful to behold.

We started a college ministry this summer at my church, to give the students who come back home for the summer break, a place to connect, discuss and hang out. Churches that are not located in major college towns struggle in the college ministry area and so do we. We still will after this summer is over, but this was a start. It is hard to sustain a group when they go away for 9-10 months out of the year and come back sporadically, even during the summer. But what I have found in my 17 years of doing youth ministry is this (and it has been reiterated to me more so now with this group than ever), they want leadership, discipleship...they desire connection, involvement and mentoring. They also long for a place back home that feels like home.

I have one former student in particular that I have continued to spend time with and invest in over these years. He has volunteered for my current church for many events and has made some huge connections with our guys and girls in the youth program. He started coming to this college thing at our church and invited students from my last church. It was awesome to see all of the students coming back for the summer and then as an added bonus, I got to see college kids I hadn't seen since they graduated 3-4 years ago from my last church.

I thought the dynamic would be strange at first, but then I realized, they are used to this kinda environment at college anyway. They are, mostly comfortable, meeting new people and branching themselves out. It has been a real pleasure watching students that allowed me to pour in to them over these last 4-7 years, from different churches, different backgrounds, connect like they have been doing. So, much to my joy, I found out yesterday that the students from my old church had planned a small college retreat to get some stuff going in their church and they had invited some of the college students from my current church to tag along, and they did!

In that room this weekend, is somewhat a result of the last 7 years of faithfulness to this God calling, in my life, for youth. There is no way, 7 years ago, when I knew these Smyrna kids as high school students, if you asked me would this weekend happen in 2013, would I have imagined it as possible. There are many different reasons why, but this just doesn't usually happen. I personally struggle, more than I would like to admit, with the thought, "am I really making a difference." Come on, if you volunteer with youth or work with youth in any capacity, you have asked yourself the same question, on multiple occasions. We don't work with youth because we expect results...most of us never get to see the fruits of the time spent raking, weeding and pouring water until many years later. But on this occasion, God revealed to me, "see, it is important. You are making a difference." It's moments like this I just throw my hands up in complete celebration and say, "Thank You, God....for allowing me to see this."

They are assembled on Lake Sinclair, at a lake house, going after God! These kids are passionate about "following," not just "believing." Now, you can kick the meaning of those words around, given the place an individual is at in their walk with Christ, but this weekend is about pursuit, pursing God by setting aside their busy schedules, because to them...what could be more important than this?

Somewhere, in your world, a bunch of college kids might be on a mission trip, on a retreat, hanging out at Waffle House or chilling in someones basement, praying for one another, seeking the face of God and not being content with this idea of cultural Christianity.  You may know these kids personally and a prayer you have been praying for years might be answered tonight or this weekend, as they meet and discuss life, injustice, morality, marriage, career and finances.

I'm not sure who exactly went this weekend, but you have, collected in that lake house, the future leaders of the church...well, not even just future, that's a weak statement...you have current young leaders, of the church, ready to make their mark in this world for Christ. They are on deck, timing the pitcher, just perfectly, taking those practice swings, studying the situation....so when their turn at-bat comes up, they are prepared and ready. And they all come from different walks of life...they aren't career ministers and clergy (at least not yet)....they are aspiring coaches, financial advisers, medical professionals, teachers and educators, journalists, reporters, and so on....all with their different gifts and talents, preparing and living out 1 Corinthians 12, being the body of Christ, made up of many parts, working cohesively and with unity and purpose, glorifying the One who binds them and strengthens them together.

This weekend, may I ask you to please pray for Coleman, Justin, Chad, Amy, Alyse, Christin, Thomas, Chelsea and all of the others there (Sorry, Coleman mentioned to me briefly who all was going but it was well after my ADD meds had worn off and I can't remember everyone's name).

For all of the inner turmoil we create as Youth Pastors, within ourselves....are we doing a good job, is any of it connecting and sinking, is it really making a difference....Yes, I will still struggle with that question many more times to come, but on this night, it is my prayer that God has already and will continue to move in a such a mighty way in each life this weekend, that they can all look back at this moment, 5, 10, 15 and 20 years from now and say, "Ah, do you remember that one time at Lake Sinclair...." That's where it got started!

Altogether Now

A few days ago I received the dreaded phone call any husband hates to get from a wife...the check engine light is on! Again!

Do you own one of those vehicles? You know, the one that goes in the shop 1 day and then a week later the check engine light comes on. You get that problem fixed only to smell something coming from the engine a month or so later, you get that fixed and then a week later, the check engine light comes on again? 

This is the same van, for 2 years in a row, that wouldn't pass emissions because it needed "street driving"....whatever that means....like we don't drive on streets enough? It had to be forced into the ready status at the shop in order for it to even pass emissions! 

Ok, so if you answered yes to having that kinda car, have you ever had a vehicle that was completely run by an onboard computer chip system?.....if you had to think about it, then you don't own one....it's pretty obvious!!!! It got so bad with this vehicle at one point last year that the mechanic we always use just told me to start taking to the dealership to get serviced....he could read the diagnostic codes on his reader because of the computer system....and because they were Chrysler only codes. 

So there I sat, in the mechanics this past week, for the second Wednesday in a row, texting all of the leaders in our youth program that I was gonna be late for open youth building day. One of them texted me back and asked if it was the same car and after acknowledging it was, she responded, "sounds like it's in it's last leg!" Haha, yeah, for a 5 year old car? Not even close, but it had been acting that way for sure.

After getting the bill for all of the other stuff they found wrong with it, I had to ask, "if I don't get this fixed will the car blow up or will it stall out somewhere in the side of the road?" His answer, "nope" was all I needed to hear...."sweet, then we can wait to get that fixed then!"

After leaving the shop, I texted everyone and told em I was on my way and one of the leaders asked what kinda car it was...I said one of those vans with the computer chip system. Her mom had one of those at one time and after stating the truth, "it's awesome when it's working," her response was, "yeah, and completely frustrating when it's not."

Yes!!!! And then my wheels starting spinning....I knew where this was going....the church!

The church is a beautiful place, when everything is working in sync with each other! It's like a production line that flows like a beautiful ballroom dance....everything is clicking and effortless, like it's floating on a cloud...but make one wrong step and land on your partners foot and everything gets choppy, the dancers are stumbling to catch their balance and the whole fluid movement comes crashing to the ground. Everything is out of whack! 

That's the church experience that I have heard time and time again over the years. Its starts out beautifully and inevitably, comes crashing down. If you have never experienced that disruption in your church experience, praise God for that! I actually love to hear those stories but don't hear them enough! 

I'm reminded of the passages in 1 Corinthians 12:12-31 about what the body of Christ it to be, one body with many parts, doing different functions, for the purpose of the One body! 

I heard Perry Noble say one time, "if the church wasn't that important, then why did Christ die for it?"....basically, yes, he died for individuals, but collectively speaking, we make up the church! Perry went on to say, "if the church isn't important then why would Jesus sit at the CEO, head position of a pointless movement?" 

Ephesians 4:15-16 says it best, that we are "to grow up in every way, in Him, who is the Head, from Him the whole body is joined together and is held together, in Him!" That is the beauty of the church....when the church reflects the beauty of Christ and not the beauty of itself. The church can and has accomplished great things, but you have seen the awkward moment when it is battling itself. It's toes were stepped on by it's dancing partner and the whole thing comes crashing down. 

Some moments are small stumbles and the balance is regained just before the big crash...and on other occasions, you can see the 2 partners dancing against each other instead of with each other. 

When the church realizes that the hand needs the foot and the footbneeds the shoulders and the shoulders need the the knees....it's awesome....but just like that female leader stated about the computer chip van, when it's not working, "it's completely frustrating!"

One of the problems and fixes that I have heard most common rests in where individuals dance against one another. Most churches lose balance and struggle when it's members ask, "what am I getting out of this?" And basically make the statement, "my needs aren't being met so the church is working against me." Rather, I think the real question should be, "what am I giving into this?" Which turns a negative situation into a more Christ like movement, "how do I meet the needs of the other movements of the body so that we, together under the Head, are a true reflection of Christ!" 

After all, He's at the head of this, not us....right? If we come out looking like the head of our specific movement in the body, we are doing a job we weren't meant to have and it will fail every time...no matter how much time, effort and passion we put into it. The passion we should have, is the Heads passion and that is, that we all work together, with our different gifts, as one body, under One Head! 

Beautiful when it's running as it should, completely frustrating when it's not.....what's been your experience? Have you fallen underneath the One Head or are you spending much of your time and effort, out from underneath The Head? 

Are you experiencing that beautiful dance or are you completely frustrated with your dance partners?

Does it seem your "van" spends more time in the shop, getting fixed than it should? 

The Frat Boy Christian

Recently, I went to check out an informational meeting held by a seminary that offered local extensions here in Georgia. It was a whim, a last minute idea that hit me the evening before the actual meet and greet. I have always been intrigued by the thought of seminary, but have never taken the plunge....why? I really don't know and at 40 years of age, it seems pointless now. But I still like to research them all. Just to see what's new that I may pick up on and read...see what new ideas are coming out of the different schools, etc....Call it continuing education of continuing education.

Any way, as I walked into the building where the meet and greet was being hosted, I noticed something odd...everyone was my age or older...or so I thought. As we went around the room, introducing ourselves, everyone was shocked to find out I was 40 years old with 17 years of ministry background. Most in the room were actually younger than me, by only a few years and none of them had more than 3-4 years worth of ministry experience. The guy leading the meeting even asked me if I wanted to get up and teach a lesson, and I told him wisdom doesn't always come with age and everyone laughed....I felt accomplished that I had fired one back...and it was a good one.

So, as we went around the room, a guy walked in with an entourage... that's the only way to explain it. The guy in the front, was much taller than everyone else and looked like he had just come from an Old Navy commercial shoot. He had turquoise shorts on...an aqua, collared shirt...aqua colored ankle socks and turquoise rimmed sunglasses...the rest of his followers were dressed in baggy khaki shorts and t-shirts (my kinda guys)! Oh, and half of the aqua collared shirt was popped up...I am guessing, to draw attention to his stellar face, which had a permanent crinkle in the side of his mouth, that exuded confidence or he had some jokes going on in his head, which caused him to stay smirky (I think I just invented a word)...

Now, before I dive in to what I want to write about, I was purposely painting a picture for you to get the idea of what I saw as this guy walked in to the room, and what everyone else at the table saw as well. I have been doing this long enough that other ministers don't impress me with their entrances, haha! I have been to enough youth pastor gatherings where Jesus and theology were talked about FAR less than "how many you runnin." I always felt out of place and a but sarcastic at those meetings because I didn't fit. But as I have matured, I know that everyone comes with a shtick ..everyone has an angle to ministry...as we should. It helps develop an identity pretty quickly with the church and the people you have been led to minister to and become a part of. I, in no way had any preconceived ideas about this guy and his "peeps" as he entered the room. I saw a person, walking into a meeting and disrupt the whole flow. That's all I saw....so,

Being the people watcher that I am, someone who loves sociology and human communication, I gazed around the room as the meet and greet leaders tried to refocus the room. My eye caught a younger fellow and his girlfriend...at the time, I didn't know how old they were but found out later, they were in their mid 20's... the second youngest in the room. I noticed his eyes roll when the "aqua-man" entered the room and he leaned over to his girl and said, "Frat Boy...obviously a frat boy." She then agreed and they whispered something else and they both chuckled.

My first instinct, because I am ADD, was to try and figure out and find out what they had said...my mind was racing with analogies, obvious statements that could have been said and mean thoughts that could have been shared. But, just as bright as the sun was beaming in through the half closed blinds, right into my face....I heard God strike my heart and ask, "so what if he's a frat boy...what's that of any concern to you?" And I agreed!

I mean really, who cares. So maybe he was (and he was, finding out after his moment to talk), why should that matter? Why should that make a difference to anyone? Why do we even feel the need to make a comment of characterization? So being a frat boy automatically comes with jokes and laughter? I mean, I get the fact that there is a stereotypical idealism to frat boys, but isn't that called judgement...the wrong kind of judgement...not at all accountability, as Paul directs the church to do all through his Epistles to other churches as they are setting up instructions and guidelines for these small start up church plants.

I am reminded, in a strange way, of the conversation that Jesus had with Peter in John 21. Peter was being reinstated by Jesus, after the 3 denials and then running away. Jesus asked Peter on 3 occasions, " do you love Me?" and all 3 times, Peter answered with "yes, you know I do." So if Peter had stopped there, everything would have been cool. Jesus was now basically telling him that His path would end up in death, not so well. Once again, just like in Luke 6, Jesus said to Peter, "follow me." Ok, so now Peter has the news, seems to be getting it, right? Nope....after those instructions  Peter obviously didn't pay any attention to them because his the whole "death" thing, he looked at the apostle John and said..."what about him?" Now, the Bible goes in to a little detail about what Jesus said in return and I'm glad it does...because we have a moment when we get our marching orders and instead of focusing on them, we want to make sure everyone else is going to die a martyrs death too, not just us and Jesus says, "what's it to you?" I have plans for John and I have plans for you...let that be enough. Leave it alone.

That passage rings so loudly in my head when I think about this random meet and greet I was a part of, for a few hours. Now, this guy, chuckling over the frat boy's entrance wasn't being given marching order by the seminary team to go die for the gospel...they were just explaining how to get in and what would be required of each student...hmm, kinda the same principle. I heard very loudly in my heart that morning..."what's it to you if that young fella is a frat boy..." Why do we feel the need to make commentaries on the lives of others around us, when they are just simply, without any harm to anyone else, being themselves. What does it really matter...what's it to you?

Because honestly, the church will never get it's act together if that is what we are doing. That is division in the church...it creates an immediate us and them....it's a characterization of someone before you ever get to actually see the "Jesus " in them. Let's take a look at our own moments where we may have been just like Peter and really listen to what Jesus is saying to him...it's not that hard to understand...it's just hard to obey, isn't it? Maybe we aren't as well off as we might have thought...

What Does an Echo Sound Like?

These last few weeks have been a whirlwind for me...moods bouncing all over the place, getting finalized for a week long mission trip to Tennessee coming up, my daughters 3rd birthday and just the other formalities of a busy life.

One of the amazing things in all of this, was my best friend came back home for a while and after seeing hi, sporadically over the last 8-10 years, I have seen him on mulitple ocassions over the last week.

Last Sunday, he suprised me at church, by popping in to say hello and an added bonus of going to church with us. We reminesced a little out in the parking lot for a while after the service and made some tentaive plans to get together again.

This morning, there he was again, at church....but this time he had extra special surprises for me. I got to see his daughters again. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen them. They had to have been 4 and 7 years old...now they are in 11th and 8th grade, wonderful young ladies!

I remember, the first baby I ever held was his first baby girl. I always told people I was afraid of babies, so I was off the hook every single time. It wasn't that I was actually afraid of them....I was afraid of me, dropping them. If you ask me to hold a baseball signed by Babe Ruth, I might balk for a minute, but I will eventually hold that treasure. Kids, well that's a whole different type of treasure and I didn't want to be the one to break anyone's treasure. How do you tell your best friend, "hey, your baby is cute but I ain't touching that little monster!"....I guess the possibility of getting thrown up or pooped on wasn't exactly something I wanted to experience either.

I became a God parent that day and here we are, 16 years removed and I still don't know what that means, Ha! I didn't grow up in that atmopshere of God parents and stuff. The only glimpse of what a Godfather was came from the movie "The Godfather" and I knew that wasn't what I was supposed to be, and when we lived in Kentucky, when I was a child, there was a pizza chain called Godfather's (that didn't help me any either).

So, today, when I saw them trailing behind him, they were probably just as frightened as I was. What was I gonna say? So, I deal with that age group every day as a Youth Pastor, so I just did what comes natural to me. It was awesome, because they are the spitting image of my friend, yet they are entirely different. It's funny, because I have 3 of my own and for some reason, that had never hit me until that moment.

After the service, we sat in the youth building, getting a chance to talk...I asked questions, listened to each one and how different they are from one another and heard about life down in south Georgia. We talked about school systems, grades, boys, teachers, parents, racism, etc....and then they asked my friend, "dad, were you bad growing up?" That is a loaded question and I just laughed out loud because, man...I could tell some stories. Of coarse I wouldn't, only some embarrasing stories, if they ask again, haha! So I had to ask, "what do you mean by bad?" Whew, I was off the hook...their idea of bad was not the same as my definition, whew!

We started to tell a few, innocent stories...you know the one's....Nothing incriminating, just fun!

On the way home, I recalled the time, when I spent the night at his house and in full disclosure, as I let my guard down, I revealed to him that I was petrified of dummies...the one's that sit on your lap and move around with strings in the back...a ventriloquist dummy. Little did I know, that he actually owned one...I think his name was Dexter...so guess who I saw when I opened my eyes that morning after a nice sleep...DEXTER! Staring me right in the face! It must have been a sight from the bottom bunk, where he was sleeping...to hear a muted scream and then see a dummy go flying across the room and nail the wall. All I remember him doing was laughing...hysterically!

What was truly amazing about this whole moment, was letting them talk, like I do every teen I get into a conversation with...to hear their heart, their passions, their ticking clock that makes them who they are. I just soaked it all up and when we were finished talking 3 hours later, I had a smile on my face the whole way home, because I was impressed by how his daughters have turned out.

Not that we were entirely bad kids, but we had some things in our lives and upbringings that set us apart from many of the other kids at our schools. We did some stupid stuff, a lot of stupid stuff and most of it stays concealed and hidden, between the 2 of us. So, it's no wonder that I had a smile on my face, just to see them, well...being typical kids, in a normal, healthy way.

I don't know where I heard this statement first, but I have remembered it and used it time and time again when talking about children..."they are our echo in to the future." I love that and am frightened by it at the same time. I looked at my kids this past Saturday, as we were gathered together for a cul-de-sac party for Audrey's 3rd birthday, and thought...what will their echo be, of me, us....

What will they say about me? What will they forget about me? What have we taught them? Have we placed them in environments that are the healthiest? Have we kept them too busy or not busy enough? Are they learning "Christ" from us and not just the church? Are they really learning at the church level? I mean, yes we talk to them about this stuff, a lot....but that doesn't always give us the full idea of what they will do with all of this processing and make decisions for themselves....based off of the foundations we have laid, or...not laid for them?

Time, and a whole lot of prayer, can only tell, but that statement is very true and should make us all pause and think about what and where we have our children, what we are teaching them, what we allow them to see and hear....Each child is different but the foundations we lay for them will be the sound of the echo, in the future, from what we are saying, teaching and leading today.

Proverbs 22:6 says, "train a child up in the way he should go and when older, he not leave (stray) from that path (way)."

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 says, "And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise"

What will the sound of our echo be....look back at your own life and think about what your parents taught you, the foundation (or lack their of for some) that was laid for you and think, what has your echo been? Do we want that same echo for our children? When I stare into the eyes of my baby girl, I know what echo I hope to hear and see from her...have you given it much thought...or prayer?

Today, I was proud of the echo I heard coming from my best friends kids...very proud!

I Swear The Path Was "Clearly" Marked....Wasn't It?

I am coming up on the staff devotion list at church, and I believe I may have found the devotion that was laid on my heart back in April, 2013....not that long ago, but it seems forever ago.

How many of us would admit to using a GPS device, of some sort? Whether it is mounted to the dash of your car or located in an app on your phone. I, for one, have never been directionally challenged...depending on who you ask, haha! My motto has always been, "I'll get there," and I always do...and I have stories to tell from along the way as well...

I am not a straight line walker...never have been, don't think I ever will be. I love the exit ramps and scenic views and possibilities of what could be and what I am possibly missing. It has driven me for years, in all different styles and forms.

So, back in April, we held our Spring Retreat up at beautiful Camp Glisson, in Dahlonega, Georgia. The retreat was called "Stripped" and I had the idea of going back to basics...getting quiet, away from our distractions and stripping away the outer layers of who we have made ourselves to be and bear ourselves before God, just as we are. After the first day, the students were going with it...yes, they also had fun making jokes about the retreat title as well (and so have I, for years, as I have used this idea 2 other times). But, on the particular retreat, I found out right away that some students were dealing with some pretty heavy baggage. These admissions to me and some of the other counselors, over a 24 hour period, left me rather astounded  I had never been on a retreat, where students were admitting some of the their struggle in day 1. It was taking on a whole different level of seriousness than I had anticipated....so I said the prayer that many pastors say, "Lord, move me out the way because they need less of me and more of you!" I did not want to screw things up....

Well, that didn't last very long! On day 2, I opened myself up to doing something I had done countless times and always walked away cynical and laughing under my breath, until I had a moment to declare to anyone within listening distance, how stupid this meditation practice was. Yes, you have been there, I am sure, if you have been in youth ministries for any amount of time. Usually  these meditation exercises are accompanied with silent moments and there is always that one middle school kid who is just waiting to disrupt any form of quiet devotion, by passing gas, just at the point when everyone gets really quiet. Once that happens, it's like someone set off a bomb in the room (sorry, had to say to it)....and the moment is lost and ruined. 

There was a female leader in our church, who specialized in this quiet, silent, prayerful exercise and she sold me on it. It didn't take much. Any time I can get other adults up in front of the kids is a bonus to me. And she did her job well...I was actually hooked and I could tell the students were buying into it as well. No one had broken the tranquility of the space we were meeting in yet and as I gazed around the room, kids were sitting still, but you could see the action and intent of their prayers on their faces. One of the only times I have ever witnessed that in a genuine way.

So, as we finished the segment, we were going to maintain silence and take a nature walk...to see the beauty and the wonder of the things around us that we look past each and every day, without giving a thought to any of it. We were going to let God speak to us through His creation. Now, on paper and in my head, it sounded like a great idea. The camp is loaded with more walking paths, trees and thick brush than roads and cabins. It is a massive camp that truly is a retreat into nature, so I knew we were in the right place to do this sort of thing. I asked the camp director if such a trail existed and she assured me it did, right behind the girls cabins, down the power lines a bit and then straight up a walking path, to the top of a massive rock that was leveled off and everyone could spread out and find a place to pray. 

So, as we headed up to the walking path, I located the power lines and felt confident we were on the right path. Now, I just needed to kill some time, have the group stop a few times and look at nature by spreading out and picking up anything they might normally miss and not pay attention to. 

We hit the trail and went left....along the way, I was looking for the "clearly" marked path up the small mountain, so I knew how to distance the journey before we came back for the ascend....I never saw it, so we just kept walking...until it was impossible to walk any farther. Mild panic set in and I knew I had probably missed it. The students and adults gathered around, still being completely silent and I made this stop one. "Spread out, look for God in a way that you miss...He speaks to us through His creation...take about 10 minutes." As the students started to move, I moved in the opposite direction, back down the trail to see if I could locate the "clearly" marked path. I caught the eye of one of the college students who was there volunteering for the weekend and he said, "you have no idea where we are, do you?" I laughed it off and said, "Not really, but it should be just down the path we walked in on." 

Well, guess what? Yep, didn't find it then either. I motioned for the group to follow back and stay in line, walking slowly, so to not miss what God might be showing them...(and slowly, so I could ask God to show me this "clearly" marked path)....We walked a bit more, passing now to the other side where we had entered the trail, and I stopped the group. Again, a planned stopped in the original planning of the walk...I was supposed to enjoy this as well and so far, all I had done was look for this "clearly" marked path. I did notice that the path kept going for a while, and just over the hill must be where the "clearly" marked path was. Some of our boy scouts took the lead and motored ahead....everyone still quiet. I couldn't believe it. The pressure to find this stupid path was on me more now....they were enjoying this and buying in to it...DANG! 

As the 2 boy scouts reached the top of the hill, ahead of us, they stopped...not a good sign. Well, time for planned stop number 3. This was the last planned stop and I had no more tricks up my sleeve. As they students spread out again, I looked ahead and saw that there was no way we could continue in the current direction. As I walked down the path the other way, the way we had just come, one of the boy scouts finally clued in and said, "we're lost aren't we?" Ha, um....Yep! Thankfully, being the ever present force in nature they are, he said he may have seen the trail quite a ways back. I told him, "dude, go find it!" As I gathered the students up for what was now supposed to be the ascending up the hill, we were walking back down the path we just walked in on instead. I took up the front and blew past anything nature looking...only wanting to find the scout and success! How could I have missed this "clearly" marked path? I was about to ruin the one genuine moment of solitude and silence these students may have for a while, and they were getting more and more in to it.

There he was, just up ahead. I picked up my pace a little and got there ahead of everyone else. Silently I gazed into his eyes and said, "well?" and he just pointed, to leaves, trees, bushes and grass. "Yeah, so where is it?" Again he quietly pointed and I seriously didn't see anything different....He said, "there is is, clearly marked......

Ok, clearly marked, to someone who spends zero time in the woods, should mean a brand new sign, a well well worn, wide path, maybe even with a walking guide post at the entrance.....Oh no, not this one. The sign was maybe 20 years old and was laying on the ground, under leaves....the only thing that gave it away....the dirt colored bricks in the shape of steps leading straight up the hill....no worn path...NOPE! The bricks were 50/50 overgrown by grass, bushes, tree stumps and leaves...so yeah....it basically looked like everything else we had seen for the last hour! Seriously ...get some neon pink paint out there and paint those bricks a completely different color than the flipping ground! 

The students showed up, walked straight up the path, to the top of a really awesome rock formation at teh top of a really steep incline, we prayed, meditated and dismissed as the students were ready to go back down...I figured they would all be chomping at the bit to get back down and to my amazement, steadily, over the next 40 minutes, students went back down...no one was in a hurry.

Successful mission in the eyes of the students...my heart was pounding and anxiety had set in...until I reached the top of the incline....Then I sat, trying to catch my breath and I recalled Moses, out in the wilderness for 40 years....my 40 or so minutes seemed like 40 years....but I remember the feeling of being frightened that I was gonna screw this experience up....and at each moment of panic, as it grew from "I got this" to sheer panic, no one new. Everyone thought it was planned this way.

As I was having my quiet time tonight, I came upon Isaiah 53:6, "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all." 

And the thought that won't leave my head tonight is this....it only takes one, unassuming individual, to lead a whole bunch a people astray....even if you weren't looking to be led astray....you could be, if you are not active in knowing who you are following. We all follow someone, or something. Are we sure the destination is the right place? Are we just enjoying the walk and not really paying attention to what is going on around us? If you're a leader, be careful how you lead. Sometimes, a GPS and a complete plan is still not enough...don't bank on it or you will find yourself still wandering. If you are leading someone, or if you are a follower...yes, without even planning on it, you can look up one day and ask, "how did I get here?"...you might be able to do that right now...where is it that you are and it doesn't at all match up with the surroundings you know you should be in?

Glory to God, that when we do stray off on that path, take that exit ramp and sped more time at the outlet malls than we should, making us late for arrival at our destination....those bumps in the roads were anticipated, known and paid for! "The iniquity of us all"....that which we deserved, we do not receive because of His great mercy, Amen?