The Reason I Still Feel Called to...and Love Youth Ministry

So, tonight, we had a fun outing...Movie Night! We took 40 or students and adults to the see Monsters University...you might be asking yourself; "where is the spiritual depth in that?" or, "how is that theological?"....It's Not, Haha! It's about having a good time and earning the right to be heard in the lives of the next generation. They are going to go to the movies anyway, so why not take 1-2 nights out of the year and do something with them that would do normally any way...

I didn't lead anyone to Christ tonight...no one walked away with a deeper understanding of salvation, righteousness or that Christ is the Paraclete (look it up) for us. What did happen tonight was a chance for friends and acquaintances, regular attendees and first time guests to hang out together, in general fellowship...not biblical fellowship...just good, ol' fashioned hanging out.

It was a blast! Being greeted by students jumping on you and hugging you when you walk up! Random and goofy conversations! Listening to hyperactive students in a groups of 3,6 and 9...tell me, all at once, about what they did 5 minutes, 15 minutes, 15 hours and 15 days ago! I won't recall all of it from memory, but that's not the point. Being there, right there on that sidewalk, taking the moment to be present in an environment where I usually don't get the chance to be...in their world, doing what they do...just being there.

So, is this the reason I still feel the love and call of Youth Ministries in my heart? Absolutely not! If I did, remove me right now! This stuff is just icing on the cake! This type of night/event, is like enjoying the fruits of your labor...sitting down to have a meal of fresh veggies that just came out of the garden. Did you catch that analogy....The labor in the field makes the meal that much more enjoyable.

The discipleship, the counseling, the planning, the budgeting (or trying to budget....bleh!), the staying late to listen, the stopping in the hallway to take advantage of a single moment when there are 100 other things to get to, the ministry of continuous interruptions, and so on...are all part of the labor, the call, the movement of this generation into the leaders of faith in the next generation. It's the Moses to Joshua principle.

When I was at the Catalyst Conference last October (a 3 day leadership conference for church leaders), Perry Noble started the whole conference off with a message that has been with me this whole year. It was right out of Joshua 1 and it sets the stage for something like tonight.

In Joshua 1, God is energizing Joshua for the transfer of leadership among the Israelite  Basically, Moses is dead and Joshua is taking over. The greatest era that the Israelite's had recently known was over, or so they thought. The great Moses had delivered them out of slavery, taken them on a wild journey that shouldn't have lasted near as long as it did (but there are some huge implications as to why they were out there that long), brought them to the brink of the promised land, so close they could taste it, and then Moses dies.

Perry made a great connection to past and future generations with his message. The reason it was so important to tell Joshua that Moses was dead was to prepare him for being the next leader. Over and over, God tells Joshua to be courageous and to not be afraid. He mapped out a successful plan for the successor. "Moses, my servant, is dead." Yikes! What was in the past was great! It set the stage for what was about to happen and Moses helped map the way...but imagine if Joshua had not been ready? What if he had not been paying attention to how Moses lead, how he communicated with God, how he battled with stiff necked people and dealt with unfaithfulness and adversity  This walk in to the promised land would have been a disaster, but Joshua was ready and the next generation of leaders was about to step it up and do what the other leaders couldn't. They were about to make the delivery!

There is a lyric from one of my favorite songs by REM from the 80's called "King of Birds" that goes, "standing on the shoulder of giants, leaves me cold...." For every future generation that leads forth and blazes a trail, there were giants that helped get them get there and they are to be recognized and remembered, yes, hallelujah and amen, but we are not supposed to look back and admire the work that was done...the focus is on the work ahead! This is why many churches and organization sputter and ultimately fail to move forward. Expecting the next generation to admire the trophies in the case without preparing them to continue the legacy forward is a for sure way to dissolve into the shadows of "what once was."

How is that accomplished? Millie Kim, our newest associate Pastor, delivered a message this morning at church, that helped connect what Perry was talking about last October, into July 1st, 2013. By discipling, mentoring, coaching and leading the next leaders to be strong and courageous! Now (pause)....

We usually hear a message like that, get all fired up, come up with plans and devices to carry this rejuvenation movement out and we miss the greatest step....God! We get so focused on the courage and strength part, that we miss the "how to's" of being strong and courageous. That strength and courage usually comes from within. We "pull up our bootstraps, pull on the work gloves and start getting dirty, without reading on. God tells Joshua, "be strong and courageous, by carefully obeying the laws given by God." He continues the importance of this by stating, "do not swerve to the left or right." Be centered, balanced and directed by God!

If we are honest with how we normally react in a situation like this, the strength and courage we usually muster up is mostly internal. We give ourselves one of those "coaches talks" right before we come back out on the field, after halftime. We psyche ourselves up, get pumped up, put all hands in the middle, give a chant and motor back on to the field, with new determination...only to give up 30 more points and get clobbered. Why does that happen? That is not the Disney movie ending we all expect. The reason is this...if the strength and courage we muster up comes from within ourselves, it will fall flat because what starts with us, ends with us. We aren't capable of pulling off the the great upset in our strength alone, because it is limited and insufficient. You can't keep drawing money out of the bank without putting money in the bank (have you ever received an insufficient funds notice?). Our strength is insufficient for the calling God has placed on the next leaders. It can get us to the edge of the promised land, but it won't get us over INTO the promised land.

This is why I love youth ministries and still feel the call as strong today! If no one is leading them, teaching them how to deposit and withdraw, who will? How will they ever succeed in their Godly ambitions and desires? I like what Perry Noble says about the next generation of church leaders...."you can either fund them or fight them." This is the labor in the labor in the fields. This is the reason youth ministers all across the country understand the term we use, "there is no such thing as a stupid question, stupid statement, stupid story".....because they are all building blocks to the future!

They may seem pointless now, until you have a student express her desire to be in full time ministry as a missionary...until you have a student spend a whole month in Paraguay, assisting a missionary...until you have a moment when a student returns home from a beach retreat, ready to share the Gospel with his whole family (weeks after the retreat has ended)....until you have that normally shy student want to get up in front of their peers and sing in the praise band or give a testimony...until you have that one student look at her community and prayerfully consider how she can get a missions based organization started at her school...and does!

All of a sudden, those silly, goofy and ridiculous conversations and events come full circle in this process of preparing , mentoring and leading the future generation, right in to the next generation of leaders the church needs. Not based solely off of what worked in the past, look what we accomplished in 1983 or 1993...rather, let's get ready in 2013 for what God is going to be doing through these students in 2023 and 2033!

In-Despicable Me 2 comes out in a week...anyone want to go build leaders?

Magic Trick Christianity - The Catch Phrase Is.....

Ok, I have to admit...I have always found magic tricks to be mind blowing!!! I am not joking! I wish I could communicate this more clearly through words but I don't think I could describe the feelings that pulse through my heart when I watch a good magic trick!

I'm talking anything from David Copperfield to David Blayne to Criss Angel to a random guy on the street corner, shuffling cards...it all fascinates me! I remember watching Copperfield make a jet disappear! I remember watching Blayne in the water bubble! I remember watching Angel go through a wood chipper and come out alive! But...the one magic trick that freaks me out the most....the levitating card out of the deck trick! Have you seen this one?

I watched a guy on my college baseball team do this one night, as we were traveling through Florida, on a Spring Break Tourney, which we stayed in a Boys Club...yeah, this was one of those "you always remember where you were moments."

This guy, opened a fresh pack of cards, held them out in front of me and told me to pick a card and remember it. After doing so, I placed the card back in the deck....now, I have fallen for a figured out the ole "flip the cards over and land on my card trick." That one doesn't freak me out anymore because it has to do with counting cards and anything with math in it, I usually tend to ignore.

So, this guy says some silly, rhyming phrase....just to be funny, he sets the deck of cards up against the wall, to where the deck is parallel with the wall and not falling over....says another phrase, flicks the deck with his finger......AND MY CARD RISES FROM THE DECK!!!!!! WHAT??????.....this is also the reason I can't say the catch phrase of the Atlanta Falcons (Rise Up), because it reminds me of this freaky card trick!

Now, some would say, "you shouldn't be messin' with the devils game." I hear ya, but to me, these are more tricks of the mind than turning a wooden staff into a snake! I truly understand the danger in the mind warping aspect of magic too...that's why it freaks me out! (And get this...the college team I played on was a non-denominational, Christian school, so of coarse we had the one Pentecostal who was ready to cast demons out of us and the deck of cards....he was joking....I think).

This brought to my mind an idea that the church practices "magical principles" at times, when it comes to the saving grace of Christ. For some denominations, there is a sinners prayer...spoken by the pastor or evangelist and then repeated by those getting saved. Then for others, there is a class you take at varying ages (depending on the denomination) and after the class, you are Christian...if you stand in front of the church and say "I do" and "I will" to a few questions, you are a believer.

Now, neither of these is full-proof and I do believe that genuine faith can be the result of both, absolutely...hallelujah, amen and praise God! But after being in the ministry now for 17 years, the most common answer, to the question, "how does someone become a Christian," is a tie between "confirmation class" and "the sinners prayer." That's an answer to a Gospel question without the Gospel in the answer. They may have been spoken and attended, but were they understood?

Yes, with both the sinners prayer and the confirmation classes, words are formed with the mouth and uttered with a voice, but was the heart ever part of it...

Let me say it this way....have you ever repeated the words someone is saying and while your mouth was moving, your mind and heart were somewhere else? You verbalized it, but if pressed later for an explanation of what you said, all you could come up with would be a blank stare while the crickets were serenading in the background?

How many times have you read a book, especially for required reading during middle or high school and you did indeed finish every page, but when the test came, you were struggling to connect the dots, place the theme or setting or remember the minor characters or even the main characters....

I remember this test we used to take in school where you were timed in reading a certain section and then you turned the page to answer the question and it was a no-no to flip back. I hated those tests!

Here's another...showing up for class doesn't make someone a student. A student, is someone who actively engages the materials and learns the material. Showing up to class doesn't make students, it makes attendees.

I am not at all saying that if you have said the sinners prayer or you went to confirmation, you don't have genuine faith...not at all...what is more important here is that we are convinced because we spoke with our mouths and believed in our hearts that Christ lived, died and rose from the dead and not by any of our own merits, we were saved. 

I run into people far too often, adults and youth alike that have spoken the words but when it comes to believing it....well, it's just not believable. There is no assurance or an original confidence that the author of Hebrews writes about chapter 3. There is no foundation, no point of reference to look back at and draw strength from. 

These 2 modes are great starting points to start the race. They both act as a spring board to launch us further into deeper waters....but they can't withstand the pressures of an eternal point of view in mind. They just don't last that long. They were both a moment in time for many and neither are long reaching! 

Romans 10:10 points to the dynamics of what is started at the sinners pray or confirmation class, if done in this manner..."for with the heart one believes and is justified and with the mouth one confesses and is saved."

What about you? Are you living in the death and resurrection of Christ, through the power of the Holy Spirit...or did you learn the right stuff, say the phrase about a man dying on the cross but when it goes beyond that, well... "dead men don't rise from the dead....it's just not believable!"

I guess the bottom line is this....were the words spoken "hollow" or "hallowed"? Huge difference! 

In "Those" Eyes!

Yes, that's me! Or was me, a long time ago...probably about 16-17 years old. I have had many requests to explain this picture and how I use it in a lesson that I have taught over the years, in the churches I have worked at. The Cure had an album called Disintegration in 1989, and there was a song on that album called Fascination Street. I had a song from The Cure in my head as I started typing this, "Boys Don't Cry"....so here goes my trip down Embarrassment Avenue!

The 80's had many forgettable trends and a few are easily noticed in the picture above. Colored tank tops, posing in a ridiculous manner for a photo opp, 80's Hair Metal (from the posters on the wall) and pink and black swim wear....wait, aren't those things still in style or coming back?

I think I actually started the trend "Who needs sheets, blankets or pillows!"...I'm pretty sure I did, and yes, all I had was a pillow, took to much effort to make a bed!

One of the unbeatable influences of the 80's was the music! It was AWESOME!!! I chose the title of this post to reflect one of my all-time favorites from that era, "In Your Eyes," by Peter Gabriel. So, now that we have all of the introductions and formalities out of the way (I will try to stop bragging about the 80's from here on out, but I can't guarantee that will actually happen), let's jump to the idea of this post.

That person in the photo is a stranger to me. No, it's not because I have aged...nor is it because my body shape has shifted...it's because that person no longer exists. There are certain aspects and characteristics of that person that are still "Alive and Kicking" (Simple Minds), but who that person was, is a vast memory. There are times, when I look back at this picture or some of the others posted here, and I wonder to myself, "what was I thinking at that exact moment?" The heart that was inside that kid is dead. Buried back in August of 1990, when I met Christ and a new creation began.

Oh, it took a while for that person to die off and in many ways, a few things are still on life support, but in reality...they are gone...only hanging on because I want them to, but completely lifeless.

What strikes me the most, every time I see this picture, is the eyes! Not because of how beautiful they were (haha!), rather, it's the worldview those eyes saw. It's the view that crushed the heart and spirit of anything truly worthwhile, replaced with anything that sufficed for the moment. I didn't have future plans or lofty aspirations...those eyes saw reality (as I knew it) and what was the purpose of setting one's self up for failure. It was the slogan, the motto that followed that kid around. No matter how much you worked on your self esteem or your outlook on life, there was always someone, at home, who would dash those to the ground and everything would come crashing down, every time.

I can still feel the fear in my heart (I really just had a wash come over my body, just now), every time the headlights of my fathers car would pull down the drive way. I would run into my room, lay down in bed and hopefully look like I was sleeping when my dad came in. I was a horrible actor or else my dad really didn't care that I might have been asleep. He would flip the lights on, tell me to get up and I could smell the eggs,bacon, hash browns and burnt raisin toast in the hallway. My dad would wake me up about once a week, after a few hours at the bar and a stop at Waffle House, somewhere around 2-3 in the morning. He really thought the bribery of food was worth the ticket price for the berating I received every single time.

There is an old Steven Wright joke that goes, "My friend and I traveled cross country and all we had was one cassette tape.....I can't remember what it was!" Haha, because it became background noise after the fourth or fifth time listening to it. After that, you just block it and I stop listening, because it's the same thing, over and over and over and.....

It was always the same thing...how I was lazy, worthless, a horrible son, wouldn't amount to anything, blah, blah, blah! I did, however really want a pair of Blue Blocker sun glasses because the infomercial made them look enticing. I knew the other infomercial about buying and selling fake real estate wouldn't make me a millionaire...Oh, and the other one...where the guy said he would send you information on how to sell products in magazines and newspapers and you could become instantly wealthy and have yachts and girls in bikini's on yachts and private islands where you could park your yachts that had girls in bikini's on them....um, yeah...was I talking about my dad?

Eventually, he would fall asleep (pass out) on the couch...actually, I knew he was out cold when he would roll off of the couch and into the floor without waking up. Then, I was free to walk back in my room and get a few hours of sleep before school the next day. Some weeks it was worse, maybe 1-2 more additional berating moments...and on other occasions, it might be a week or two...but ultimately, like clockwork...it happened.

So, I look into those eyes and I can vaguely see what that kid saw...nothing! It was all pointless. As I even stare at this picture, that look is an identical gaze that my father would give..weird! Those eyes didn't know happiness, unless it was a created moment that lasted until that moment was over. Those eyes didn't know friendship because I kept everyone at a manageable distance...very distant. I only let people see what I wanted them to see. They knew "the me" I was at school. But they never got the real "me." I shied away from most interactions that were deeper than first name basis and an occasional hang out moment after school. I had 1-2 close friends, but they even stayed on a rotation.

I was angry at the world, angry at society, angry at peer groups, angry about school and angry at God, if there was one. I look at these picture and wonder, who was this guy because if you know me, I mean really know me, I am nothing like any of this! Completely different!

The eyes have been said to be the window to the heart...well, depending on how you look at it (no pun intended) it can be seen (stop it!) like this...

1. I must have left my window wide open then, through all of the seasons of life and let everything in! I didn't have a filter at all. My window was screen-less (and to a certain extent, I still don't have a filter, but what I have learned and am still learning is self control). But, my eyes were the greatest deceiver in those days. If it looked good, if it looked fun...do it! That was the dumbest principle to live by, I know...but, if we are honest with ourselves...where does any temptation start? Usually with the eyes.

2. I left my window so closed up, through all seasons of life, my glass panes became cloudy with condensation because I was trying to create my own environments. Blasting the cool air when it was hot outside or turning up the heat when it was freezing cold. I was in control of my own surroundings and the only person I ever thought about was me. It wasn't that I purposely ignored people or made people mad around me, I just didn't care, as long I was ok. Again, not the greatest principle to live by.

We can all relate to one of those 2 principles, at some point in our lives. We become completely insulted, protecting ourselves from any environment, guarding our own heart. Or, we just take it all in, don't give much thought to consequence and just embrace it all.

But, THE biggest thing I see when I look in to those eyes is exhaustion. I have always had dark circles around my eyes, partly because I guess I inherited that from my dad...but also, I can't fall asleep! I have had a problem with that for years...but this is more than physical exhaustion. It's a deeper gaze, from the soul. Relationships were tiresome, friendships were bothersome, school was worrisome, trying to be someone I wasn't around so many different people...school, friends, family, athletic teams, etc...Putting on a front can be tired. Have you ever been mentally and emotionally exhausted? What is it for you that just crushes your soul? I mean, honesty...answer it for yourself, nobody is listening..be transparent with yourself.

The night I met Christ, I was convinced beyond a shadow of doubt, that He was real. As much as I tried to use all of my defense mechanisms to fight this belief that was moving in to my heart, it became pointless. I will not go in to the whole experience but I will summarize it this way...no one knew I was tired. I didn't let that show. If there was a party, I wanted to be there! If someone wanted to hang out, I was there! If no one was available, I made my own excitement! I was on the go, physically...but emotionally and mentally, I was dying. Spiritually, well...there was no spirituality to me. I was an atheist...I didn't believe in anything.

The first time in my life that I had ever went to church and actually listened, Matthew 11:28-30 was the verse used for the lesson that night. I don't remember anything about the sermon and that was secondary. The verse speaks of rest...a rest that only Christ can give. A rest from carrying around this heavy load and back breaking burden. His ways are easy and His burden is light. LIGHT, seriously? The more I read about this Jesus dude, the more I realized His life was the complete opposite of light. His burden was tremendous!  But yet, here He was, telling me..."I got this!"

There is no way that this situation was coincidence. I wanted to believe it was, but there were just too many factors that led me to be there that night...and the original intent wasn't Jesus. Actually, He wasn't even part of the reason for going at all. To be honest, up until that point, I don't think I had ever had a thought about Jesus. I don't mean the "he came in to my head and I didn't know what to think so I didn't" idea...I'm talking about, up until that point, never once had I even had a thought of Jesus, for anything.

And what I have learned over and over again, as I have walked this life with Christ, is that when we become completely honest with ourselves...admitting who we truly are and what we are made up of, that is exactly where God meets us. Not in the facade or the front we are putting up. If you don't believe, then admit it, "I don't believe!" When you come to the end of yourself, that's when the life with Christ begins!

The reason I don't recognize the guy in those pictures any more is because he ended! And Christ brought rest, peace, grace, His passions, His view, and His heart in to that old person and it brought about complete change and regeneration.

Now that I have totally embarrassed myself with the pictures and some stories, it is always my prayer that these posts are helpful, insightful, convicting and yet entertaining as well.

If you were or have been affected in any way by any of these posts, please feel free to share with me by commenting here or shooting me an email at jay_gulbin@aol.com.

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RETHINKING YOUTH MINISTRY

RETHINKING YOUTH MINISTRY

Fanfare at it's Finest

Ok, I am going to show my age and my ridiculous obsession with professional wrestling when I was a child with this post, but it was a glorious, whimsical, time of life. I say professional wrestling because this was back before the wrestlers admitted it was fake but the rest of the population over the age of 11 knew it was. These guys were such good actors, seriously, that they could stay in character at any public event, affecting the psyche so deeply, they actually had believed the lie and would get emotionally upset at the notion that someone would challenge them about wrestling being fake.

My room was littered with Major League baseball player posters before my wrestling obsession (and after my wrestling obsession  the walls were covered with the likes of Motley Crue, Metallica, Def Leppard and Van Halen posters). Like any kid can do out in a sandlot, making up fictitious players and play a whole 9 inning game, I was able to wrestle fictitious wrestlers. On the playground, one had to have a good memory because the other players were invisible. With my PBW (Professional Bedroom Wrestling) association, I at least had a tangible opponent....my pillow. My pillow was probably the best character actor in the history of the world. On any given moment of any given day, my pillow became Ric Flair, Buzz Sawyer, Tommy Rich, Jerry Lawler or one of the Road Warriors. I always played the part of my favorite wrestlers and the pillow was always the bad guy! If you followed wrestling, and many my age claim to have never watched it but I think that is because they are having a hard time reconciling as an adult that they actually, probably at some point, did indeed watch World Championship Wrestling on TBS with Gordon Solie and the all nighter on Saturday with Joe Pedicino for 6 straight hours!

Have I convinced you enough of my obsession....if not, here is a little more. During that time period (mid 80's to late 80's) there was a competing wrestling association from the north, called WWF. They had Hulk Hogan and we in the south had Ric Flair. They had cartoon characters, we had real wrestling and no selling out. They had arena's, flash, gimmicks and 4 minute matches on television, we had a small, live studio in the TBS building where the matches lasted 10-12 minutes on many occasion. It was always known by us WCW followers, the WWF was the place most good wrestlers went to die (career speaking) because they were given silly nicknames, turned into goofballs and were gone in months. But, the WWF was paying more because they were getting more exposure.

Convinced of that obsession yet....good!

So, I grew up in Roswell, Ga in 1981-1988. Roswell was growing but still far from what it is now and the neighboring town, Alpharetta, was where all the farmers, rednecks and country folk lived...that's what we thought anyway. Alpharetta is now one of the wealthiest zip codes in the entire southern region of the United States. It's not uncommon to see any player from a professional sports team in Atlanta, at a gas pump, right next to you. But back in 1982-1983, the largest mall we had was a little strip mall called Roswell Mall and it was big stuff to us. It had a walk in basement with a movie theater, pizza shop and an arcade. (I remember when the movie theater was actually in the mall, upstairs and only had 2 cinemas...I saw Invasion USA there, a real Chuck Norris thriller)

Back in the early 80's, celebrities did not make the rounds through Roswell, Ga. when they came into town. There were no real places to make a public appearance. We had a K-mart on one side of the mall and a Richway on the other side of the mall (later bought out by Target and then bought out by 4-5 other companies).

So, as my best friend and I were strolling through K-mart one afternoon, we saw a poster that the Road Warriors, the most viscous tag-team ever assembled, EVER...was going to make a public appearance at the K-mart. WE FLIPPED OUT! This doesn't happen in our world and we were soon making plans to get there any way we could.

Well, the meet and greet day came and I remember pulling into the parking lot and there were no parking spots available. I was crushed. Every bordering county (it seemed like every bordering state) must have found out about this once in a lifetime chance to meet the greatest tag-team ever. I mean, even a non-wrestling fan would want to come meet these guys. They were HUGE! Way bigger than any wrestler at that time, but what made them stand out from everyone else were there Mohawks and face paint. They were intimidating on TV and every time I hear the opening notes to "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, I still envision the Road Warriors running to the wrestling mat and not waiting for the bell to start the match. Most matches were over in a matter of seconds.

As we parked across the street and walked over, it was apparent these people were not here for an incredible "Blue Light" special deal. The line to meet the Road Warriors was throughout the entire store. I am not exaggerating at all. There must have been 500-750 people there. So, we took our spots in line and waited...and waited...and waited.........

Finally, we had just made it passed the backdrop area where they took all of those cheesy pictures you see all over the web, "bad family photo's"...yep, I remember when that stuff was real! The wrestlers were now in view, but we were still a few hundred people away....and then, the worst moment of my then 11-12 year old life happened...the voice over the loud speaker. If you grew up going to K-mart, you know the voice...you actually knew the announcement was coming before the voice because the employee didn't know how to operate the speaker correctly, so you could hear them breathing into it a few moments before they actually spoke.

The announcement was not a "Blue Light Special"..."attention K-mart shoppers, the meet and greet is now over. Thank you for coming out and continue to shop our store for all of the great items on sale, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!"

No way this was happening, NO WAY!!!! But sure enough, here they came, hulkishly walking down the aisle, making their way right past all of these people who had been waiting hours! NO WAY! This was not going to happen.....(Pause) now, I was a very skinny kid growing up and by skinny I mean, you could see my heart beating through my chest in a standing position. I was social, but only if you approached me first. I was never the first one to act out or make a scene, ever! I'm not sure when all of that changed, but who I am today is nothing like who I was then. Maybe this was my coming out party!

As they walked directly in front of me, the Road Warrior named "Hawk," the one with the reverse Mohawk  looked like he had just eaten a few kids like me for breakfast that morning. The scowl on his face, the head jerking and arms flailing as he was literally knocking little hands off of him, looked right at me and stuck his tongue out...kinda like any demon possessed individual from an 80's horror flick. Normally, I would have pee'd in my pants on spot and then hid in a rack of clothes, but not today. All 82 pounds of me, stood up strong, leaped out towards his direction with my pen and magazine cover and slapped him on the arm....

Time stood still for all of 8 seconds but I literally played out my death, my funeral and burial in those 8 seconds. It was a lovely ceremony, many people had wonderful things to say....BAM! Back to reality! I was greeted by a slap to my chest, my magazine cover and pen felt as if they had left an imprint on my shirt and when I pulled it away, I had an autograph, "Hawk!"

Now, I say all of that to say this; what is it in your world that freaks you out? I mean, who or what is it that you will drop everything for and go see? What would you risk your life for, even if it wasn't literally in harms way? What would you drop everything for?

For many of us, the obvious answer is family; our children, our siblings, our cousins, aunts and uncles. But I'm not talking about that...I am talking about "fanfare"...those things that seem to really matter, but don't. Even if it's just for the the experience, a once in a life time shot, would you run to it in a heart beat? Experiences fade, they go away and before you argue with me, we take our experiences to the grave with us, never to be remembered again. Are these things that important? As a child, a pre-teen and even a teen in some situations, I get it. There is a pass.

This year at Beach Retreat, I had one of those moments again. I have learned to give away a lot of what I spent wasted time and effort and knowledge on. It takes a lot to move me now days. It's not that I am cynical about it, I have just learned to compartmentalize what is truly important and what isn't. What deserves a "WooHoo!" and what doesn't.

After praying with students for almost an hour, one after the other and watching, feeling those chains being broken in lives, I was exhausted. I was completely wiped out and missed out on a few of the stories I normally get to hear about. On the car ride home, I had texted one of the other adults during a stop at the gas station and as we chatted, he told me that a particular student had accepted Christ into His heart the night before and we had both been praying for this kid for at least a month before Beach Retreat. I finished pumping my gas, checked my phone one last time before I cranked the car back up and read his text to me. I pumped my fist in the air, and with a loud shout of praise to God, I screamed, "WOOHOO!" Because that my friends is worth getting excited over. It is eternal and won't fade away because there is life beyond the grave. If all you look for are experiences and moments, they are enjoyed on the earth, but that's as far as they go. Yes, enjoy those moments, capture those memories, because they do enhance this wonderful life we have, but have you replaced the "Real Joy" in life with chasing after experiences and memories.

I get it, we all are fans of something or someone. But in all of the years I have been a Chicago Cubs fan, they have come close to the World Series 2 times. There are people who have lived to over a hundred and never seen the Cubs play in a World Series, much less win a World Series. A day will come when they finally will win it all and even if it comes or doesn't come in my lifetime, it won't affect me at all. Yes, I would be happy and cheer, but it would not and could not replace the moments I have had, knowing that someone has been risen from death to life, because they have placed their life in the hands of Jesus Christ. There is no greater joy, not even close!

Do you know what I'm talking about?

Who Can Follow Jesus?

Andy Stanley, pastor of North Point Church in Alpharetta, Ga. (The same town the church I currently serve as youth director) is located, recently finished up an 8 part series called "Follow." In it, he cuts through the red tape of who can follow Jesus and concludes, everyone can. Now this may seem like an obvious statement, but the way it was laid out really drove home a very real concept to me...we may believe everyone can, but do we want every one to?

I especially loved the sermon on calling Levi (Matthew) as a disciple. He was a tax collector and in Jewish culture, that position was considered lower than a sinner. Outright and open sinners, who had no regard for the laws and statutes of God, were more accepted than tax collectors. To be a tax collector meant that you sought the approval of Rome to tax your own people. It was a lucrative business for both Rome and the Jewish person who dared ask. Once they were approved, they could begin taxing their communities for just about anything and if taking money wasn't bad enough from your own people, you were doing it in the name of the enemy...twice as bad! (Mark 2, Luke 5)

I have always believed you can't take the individual, human emotion away from biblical characters, when reading the bible. Sometimes we have the false idea that they were emotionless, zombie like creatures who were bland and lifeless... They come off that way if you just read the words of the text, but if you let the stories come to life, you get a very real picture of how emotional, strong willed and beat down many of these 1st century Jewish people were. 

So, it's not a far cry to think that when Jesus approached the booth that Matthew was sitting in, to collect taxes, the crowds must have thought Jesus was going to give Matthew a piece of His mind! Surely He was going to show Matthew the injustice of his livelihood and belittle Matthew, because, after all, Jesus was Jewish too. It's not a stretch to imagine the followers He did have at this time, groan with disgust as Jesus didn't chastise Matthew, but rather asked him to join His followers.  I can imagine a few might have walked away because they were not going to be in a group that had as an equal associate, a tax collector...I mean, people have their breaking point, they have their standards and sometimes, too much is just too much (sarcasm). 

What I find absolutely interesting about this account and the other accounts of Jesus asking people to follow Him, (Peter, John and James, Phillip and Nathaniel) is that there is no mention of repentance! There is no mention of a salvation experience! There is no mention of "change your life, stop doing this and then you can follow me!" It's as if He literally said, "come as you are and follow me!"

How awesome and yet confusing is this! Now, we must not assume at this point that they were believers. I had always imagined they were but if you follow their stories, their faith grew, moment by moment, but not because of their great faith, but because of their lack of faith! They got it wrong in just about every situation they encountered and even Jesus said on more than just a few occasions, "do you still not believe" and "you people of little faith." 

The testing of their faith, in following and trying to believe actually led to their outright belief....but it took a while...for almost all of them. It wasn't even the death, it was the resurrection. I always wondered why no one was at the tomb, waiting for Jesus to burst forth and come alive! I mean, it's so clear from the texts. I know I would have been there....at least, I think so. Yeah, probably not! 

These guys had a hard time believing a dead guy could come back to life! What a comforting acknowledgement that the guys who walked with Jesus, side by side, didn't expect Jesus to come back from the dead....why a comforting feeling? Because they didn't get it right either and they saw Him and walk with Him. 

Too much of our current world Christianity tells us that we got to get it right! How could we not believe, it's clear and obvious! Yeah, when you have a story, records and eyewitness accounts in a book recorded 2000 years ago! If they walked and heard the 1st hand account and struggled with it, how in the world are we supposed to think we will get it right all of the time.

We spend too much time judging people based off of a single moment in time instead of viewing the entire collection of ones life. If we had only the story of John wanting to burn an entire village up because they didn't want Jesus to come through, we could easily conclude that he didn't get it and wasn't a Christian. If all we had was Peter's denials, it would be safe to assume that he wasn't a real believer either. But those moments were just that, moments! An entire body of work is a string of moments tied together, that leads us to a better understanding.

Perhaps my favorite story in all of this is the centurion guard in Matthew 8 and Luke 7 (a Roman soldier)....the enemy! He approached Jesus, asked for his servants healing, Jesus wanted to go to his servant and the guard said no...he believed Jesus was able to do his healing from right there and he just wasn't worthy of having the presence of The Lord at his house. Jesus was so moved by this, He stopped His followers and declared this was the greatest act of faith He had seen this far....are you kidding me! This guy wasn't even Jewish! Faith was not available to him. He was on the wrong team on 2 accounts (he worked for the enemy and by birth, not being Jewish, he was out anyway). This is astounding. Jesus turned to His followers, those who supposedly believed in Him (if you believe they actually did) and He used a non Jew and an enemy as the sign of greatest faith He had ever seen!

Jesus was definitely counter acting much of what the Pharisees taught. They were exclusive, even to the Jews....if you did these laws then you were in but if you didn't, you were out! You had to do "this" and have these "evidences" to be one of them, for it to be real, genuine. Jesus seems to be flipping that around and saying, be one of us and along the way, you will become! It seems as if belief doesn't come before following. It really seems as if Jesus was saying, following will lead to belief. 

It definitely seems to make it more genuine and it definitely takes the "check list" system out of the equation. Almost, as if the follow first principle leads to a more healthy acceptance and enjoyment of doing the law, which Jesus himself said "I have come to fulfill, not abolish." (Matthew 5). There seems to be a natural falling in love with Gods ways and desires this way. The belief to follow idea seems to be structured around the do's and don't do's, which is why, I believe, many Christians in our current world battle over their fleshly desires and have low or poor self esteem as a Christian. 

It's like practicing anything, really...one doesn't become a baseball player the moment they put their first uniform on. Now, they may look like a baseball player, but there are skills and footwork, and rules that need to be understood first. You aren't a player if you know the rule book but can't hit a ball or run the bases. Even if you know what to do, a situational genius, you got to be on the field to be able to put the knowledge to use. Getting out on the field, putting on a glove, learning the skills needed along the way will lead you into becoming an actual player. 

Now, not all who follow become believers. When Jesus was freaking people out by telling them to eat His flesh and drink His blood (John 6), the bible records that many "followers" said "this teaching is hard" and they walked away. This is so very true for the analogy above. Little league fields are full of kids with the want to play ball but as you go up in levels, the numbers dwindle because it's harder at each level and kids just drop out. 

So, this has been a huge shift in how I have always viewed the disciples in the bible and how one actually becomes a believer. Jesus promises Phillip and Nathaniel in John 1, follow me and I will show you Greater Things than what you just saw! Who can follow Jesus, anyone can! the invitation is open to everyone! Come on, follow me, come and see, take a taste, yes it's hard, yes you will get it wrong and yes, if you follow, you will look back and see you are not who you were!

Praise be to God that He asks us to follow, just as we are because He loves us too much to allow us to stay where we are! 

When Did Worship Become a Place?

Ok, before you think I am attempting to split hairs here, this topic has really bugged me for a long time...I think it originated in my heart in August 1990, the month I became a Christian.

What is worship? We can't define that completely because there is just too much to get in to. But, for the sake of my point, I remember thinking my first few times in a church at 18 years old, "I could clearly define what worship wasn't..."

1. Sourpuss faces, easily found on almost every other pew. I could never understand this as an early Christian...this is God, the Giver and Sustainer of life here! Why look so ticked off to be in His house...

2. The Lord's Prayer - isn't there a more exciting reminder of the prayer Jesus suggested to the disciples as He was teaching them to pray? Maybe not, but I have always thought so. These are life changing words of the Savior! Why, in unison, does a body of believers sound like a low hum of a pesky mosquito flying around the ear, when reciting the Lords Prayer?  

3. Hymnals - I didn't grow up in church, never read King Jimmy (King James Version) so I think I may have missed out on some of the sacredness that happens at church...where is the joy? I mean, obviously the responsibility of each worshipper is in the heart and actions of the worshipper, but this music has never moved me. I don't connect with it. Now, if I just sit still and read the words of the hymns, that changes everything. But that is just me.

There are plenty more observations I could share from when I first became a Christian, but that's not the point of this writing. My opinions have changed throughout the years on each of these issues as I have matured. 

But the one question that I believe must be asked is...why do we refer to "the church" as worship. For instance, 2 pastors are talking and one says to the other, "how many did you have in worship today?"...isn't that a massive assumption that everyone worshipped? 

Honestly speaking, in the 20+ years I have been a Christian, there have been many Sunday services where I was present in body but a non-participant in "worship" - the act of, anyway...how bout you? When someone asks you what you did today, maybe your response, on a Sunday is, "we went to worship." But did we? I mean, we went to a church, but did we worship? I know, the splitting hairs part, right!

But honestly, looking up the definitions gives any reader a clear understanding that the 2 are completely different....

1. Worship - (verb and noun) reverence paid to, worthiness, respect/honor to....a religious act, offering to a divine being....to perform or take part in worship through an extravagant respect, honor and devotion (Merrian Webster)

2. Church - a building for religious activity, mainly worship...a body or organization of religious believers...(Merrian Webster) 

So, my fear is that we have watered down the idea of worship by attaching the phrase to a building. Worship is still an action, that is performed in the church, but the church itself is not worship. 

Yes, we can worship in church, but that doesn't mean we can so easily label that place as worship....Can't we worship anywhere? Maybe the better question is, shouldn't we worship everywhere?  Because realistically, everywhere we go could be considered "worship."

For example - I have great moments of worship in my car through music and sermons on podcast but you won't find me telling a friend, "yeah, my radiator was overheating so I took the worship in to get checked." I also have great moments of worship in my bed, through reading books, listening to sermons and worship music. You will not hear me telling my neighbor, "you know...we have had that worship for 20 years and every 5 years or so, we flip the worship over so we can sleep better but I think it's time to go to the mattress store and look at some new worship."

These are ridiculous situations, I know! But it proves my idea, that worship is not a place, worship is not attendance, worship is not showing up and osmosis takes place to where we become worship. 

Let's start looking at worship for what it really is and we might see our days looking a little different. In searching for the best way to describe this idea, I could only come up with this phrase to explain....what is worship - it is the act of giving every breath back to the Originator of each breath! Let's give back to God  what is His anyway! 

For a realistic approach to worship, read Acts 16 and notice a few things...Paul and Silas were worshipping (singing songs) in prison.....in prison! Do you think when they were arrested, they thought, "I can't wait to write to everyone and tell them we have been placed in worship?"....no, haha! Worship came upon them and as they were singing songs to God, the prisoners were listening! There worship became contagious, not because of where they were, but because of "Who" they were worshipping! 

What is worship: giving each breath back!

Where can we worship: church, car, bed, prison and everywhere! 

Do I have a tendency to keep my breath to myself and just be ok with attendance and showing up, thinking I worshipped?.....NO!.....honest answer, yes.

How bout' you? 

God Doesn't Give Out Hall Passes

So my twin daughters have graduated 5th grade and are approaching Middle School. While that may sound scary (and it is), they are finally in my wheel house, youth age! I remember these days so well, even though the faces have faded and the names forgotten, the situations and emotions still live on in my heart and mind, vividly! As we recently sat at parent orientation for all upcoming 6th grade families, I was struck by the similarities to my Middle School days, back when we rode dinosaurs to school...While the systems and curriculum have changed, there is much that hasn't. 

Let me say it this way...

Elementary school was great, for me, but I can hardly remember the details. It's like the TV shows I grew up watching during the late 70's...Romper Room, Captain Kangaroo and Night Stalker (yes, I saw one episode as a child and it freaked me out). Each show had main characters that I can recall but not the minor characters (I remember my teachers names from elementary school but not many students) and each show had a plot/point (we learned stuff in class but I can't remember a single lesson plan). I wasn't connected to these shows because I was too young to remember them thoroughly....

But, shows from the early 80's, when I was Middle School age....I remember everything about my favorites. Magnum PI for instance; I remember the red Ferrari, Higgins (the wealthy landlord), the Doberman pinchers that hated Magnum, TC, (Magnum's best friend) who flew a helicopter. I clearly recall the A-Team! Hannibal was the cigar smoking leader, who came up with most of the plans. Face, the the imposter who could play any role and got all the pretty ladies. Murdoch was the crazy pilot they had to break out of the looney house at the beginning of every episode. BA was the grunt, warrior who hated everyone and hated flying even more!

I could go on and on (Miami Vice, Matt Houston, Fantasy Island and World Championship Wrestling on TBS every Sunday evening, right after Jacque Cousteau). I say all of this to build my idea; there are some moments in life that leave an imprint on our hearts and some things we vaguely remember. 

As I was walking the Middle School hallways during the parent walk around, I was instantly taken back to roaming the halls as a Middle School student myself. In Middle school, the one thing that most kids coveted to escape the boredom of learning was the "hall pass." This was every students "get out of jail free" card on the board game of Middle School. The destination usually resulted in a bathroom trip but that wasn't the only place to go! The hall pass was liberating. It came with power and mystery. How far could you go into the other areas of the school? How long would it take to make the rounds of your friends classes before it seemed you were gone too long? 

I remember, by high school, the teachers were on to the tricks of the hall pass shenannigans and they had employed some rather slick tactics to cut down on the amount of freedom the hall pass gave a student. The best one I can remember, a teacher used the massive, classroom globe as a hall pass to prevent students from roaming. I can read your mind, "just ditch the globe and come back to claim

It before you entered class..." That had been tested and proven to not work so well...considering every time it was ditched, an encounter with the assistant principle was moments away.

When I entered college, I was impressed with the amount of responsibility placed on each student to get to class, on their own. I learned the consequences the hard way in my freshman year, with my first 8am class. The freedom to not have to go to class was thrilling and exciting! It felt great to make my own decisions about whether sleeping in was more important than attending a class...until I received a letter in my student inbox on campus that warned, "another absence from "introduction to Christian Education"  would result in automatic failure." I was shocked, I was determined to give it my all, I failed!

But something happened my junior year of college that sticks with me to this day. The professor of my Creative Bible Teaching class was a very friendly and hands on teacher. All of the students loved him because he didn't believe in tests, rarely took roll, greeted everyone at the door with a hug or handshake and believed in class participation. He made the learning experience fun!

I had slept in on a Wednesday morning and felt just awful about missing his class. I worked up a good excuse, for 2 days, for when I saw him Friday, he would see how truly sorry I was for missing. When I approached the building and saw him standing at the door, I felt a swarm of butterflies multiplying in my stomach. I walked slowly to class, trying to word my excuse just right. I tried to walk in with another student, hoping to slide to the side and avoid eye to eye contact and a greeting, but he saw me...looked right into my eyes and said, "missed you on Wednesday." I immediately jumped into excuse mode, "sorry professor, I was up all night studying for an oral exam, baseball practice went late and I didn't get a chance to study until late, then I woke up a little late with the intent to come and I cut myself shaving....." And as I babbled on, he put his hand out, placed it on my shoulder and said, "I didn't ask you what you were doing and why you missed. I just wanted you to know that you were sincerely missed." ((((Pause))))....."thanks professor," I said, In embarrassment. I could have been picked up off of the floor with a doggy pooper scooper because that is how I felt! 

You see, many of us treat church and church attendance on Sundays as a classroom setting...having to be there, begrudging every moment of it while looking for ways to escape and find freedom. We also use Monday through Saturday as our hall pass, the freedom to roam about as we wish, having it all planned out, just right, before we have to go back to class. 

When someone actually gets up the nerve to say to us, "missed ya," as we try to sneak in unnoticed, excuses abound! 

Can you relate? Have you ever felt that way in church? Is that your experience? If so, we have a Savior who doesn't need to hear our excuses, He knows what we were up to any way. Sometimes we don't approach the doors of church because of the fear of judgement and chastisement....and rightly so. They don't work to create a genuine experience with the living God. What does work? Love and kindness! Both of these create an acceptable conviction that speaks to the soul and the heart. 

Romans 2:4 says that it is "Gods kindness, that leads us to repentance."

We are responsible for ourselves in getting to church...no one else is responsible for that. It's up to us, and we don't have to go. It's our decision to stay away, sleep in and create excuse after excuse as to why weren't there. If you are afraid of what someone may say to you, you may be at the wrong church! You need to be in a body of believers, a community of Gospel living followers who will look at you, when excuses fly out of the mouth, place their hand on your shoulder and say, "no excuses needed, just wanted you to know you were missed." 

Do you have that?